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A Night Of CRAP

"You are a terrible spy!" Rachel howls the instant we've smashed over to the auditorium, where the Glee Clubbers have gathered in a tier of seats to glare down as one at the utterly unnecessary guest star mentioned in Finn's question, the latter of whom has placed her infamously Botoxed self in the well at the foot of the stage, the better to look all helpless and unthreatening and alone. Or something like that. Hey, wasn't Jonathan Groff supposed to be back on this show already? Now, there's a villain from Vocal Adrenaline I sure as hell won't mind seeing again. And can you imagine him and Cheyenne Jackson being evil together? I could die, I'm telling you -- just die.

Unfortunately, if Jonathan Groff is coming back to this show, he's not coming back tonight, so I have little choice but to put up with this little fleck of stuntcast nothing for however much longer they've decided to keep her on my television screen. Fortunately, I can do my best to keep her remaining time on this show brief, if only in the recap, so long story short, Ongina swears she's not a spy, and insists she's only there to offer her support to McKinley High's Brainiacs. She volunteers to perform at the benefit, thereby all but ensuring each and every one of her 600 Twitter followers will buy a ticket to the event, and to prove her heart's in the right place, she hops up on the stage to present us all with her rendition of Eric Carmen's "All By Myself," accompanied of course by the magically appearing Tinkles along with those poor mute schmucks from The Jazz Ensemble. As I noted in the recaplet, this song was a hell of a lot funnier the first time we heard it on this show a year and a half ago, and as that's really all I have to say about any of this, I'll simply note that after she's done, the idiots in New Directions agree to place Ongina on the benefit's bill, despite Rachel's strenuously delivered warnings against such action. Mercedes even meekly agrees to get bumped to the middle of the lineup to accommodate the unwanted interloper -- an accommodation Lauren finds reprehensible, as we discover in the...

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