Survivor
Big Trek, Big Trouble, Big Surprise

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Reconstituted Beefcake

Back in the Yaxha boat, the team gets to the dock and extracts its gear from the boat. Close, but no cigar. Er, fire.

Jeff congratulates Nakum on winning the better camp, and he gives them their tribe flag. Better yet, they get that flint, which goes to Margaret, appropriately enough. At least you know she won't lose it, eat it, or forget where it is, which is more than I can say for the average Survivor contestant. Margaret is really busting the curve as far as usefulness. Now, Yaxha approaches. Jeff tells them not to get settled in, because they're not staying here. He explains again that they will be at the sucky camp, and he gives them a map that will show them how to get there. He gives them their tribe flag, too, which is a moment you can always tell that Jeff really cares about and everyone else totally doesn't. Yaxha wanders off as Steph voices over that while they lost, she still thinks they "kicked butt." Well, it was good of her, at least, to get things off to a traditional start by getting knocked on her ass. She also says, and I am not inclined to disagree, that it's the hardest challenge the show has ever done. Eleven miles? Twenty-four hours? Through the jungle? Yeah, I can't think of one off the top of my head that was any harder. I certainly can't think of one I would rather not do, unless it's one of the ones where you have to make your mother eat rotten snakes or something. I do like my mother. Anyway, Yaxha piles into its boat to head for camp.

Next thing you know, crocodile! As Morgan (still a "Magician's Assistant," I SWEAR) explains, they weren't in a great mood heading off to camp, what with the losing. Steph Jerseys the hell out of the statement that they had to paddle "awwwwl the way across the lake" to get to their new camp after they lost. She sounds exactly like my brother-in-law would sound if he were on this show. Except that he would be humming something by Rush. Anyway, the weary Yaxha heads into the jungle, and when they finally find camp, they start by wondering what the pots and such are for. Quickly, though, they stop wondering about practical things like tools and decide to give themselves a pep talk by chatting about shelter, quickly settling on a lean-to as the preferred structure for this particular spot. As the team works on the shelter, Steph interviews that she's very relieved to finally be on a tribe that has "as much heart and determination" as she does. I certainly hope that will be the one and only mention of that during the season, because dissing your former tribe is a one-to-a-customer event, really. Furthermore, her entire tribe didn't suck last time, although seriously...she did have Kim and all those gross people on her team. And she had Jeff the Ankle Quitter, and it was just...her team was lame, seriously. Rafe adds that while they were "dead tired," they were revived by their "Yaxha spirit." Ewww. I hate spirit. Also, Rafe needs to sound less like he's recruiting for the It's A Small World ride at Disneyland.

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Survivor

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