House
Charity Case

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Minus Thirteen

Benjamin is in surgery about to be put under and have a kidney removed. He's asked, "Are you sure you wanna do this?" Yes: "Relax. This is gonna make me very happy." He goes under. They start on his kidney, and the machines go crazy with the beeping and the pinging. Someone (possibly Wilson? Everyone's wearing surgical masks and there's also all this pinging and beeping going on) says, "Patient's unstable. The surgery's off."

The arrhythmia's back. Park suggests a spider bite. Nope! Adams rejects everything. Foreman comes in so House can gloat at him. Foreman ignores this and says, "You're off the case." He thinks House dosed Benjamin to create false symptoms so he couldn't be discharged. Park says that's idiotic. Foreman says he knows how House works. House says he knows how Foreman thinks. Foreman glares at him and tries out his Boss Voice: "What'd you give him" House pretends to be outraged: "Nothing! And you can't prove otherwise." Foreman declares that House no longer has access to the patient. Foreman leaves. Adams is outraged. House says Foreman is the boss. And also, he was right.

House leans over a railing and throws things at the janitor. What a jerk. Is this the same janitor that had to clean up his hair clippings from the opening scene? I bet he wasn't happy to see House back. Adams speculates that House had a good motive. Somehow. House figures Adams didn't get the job or she wouldn't be back here saying nice things about him. He asks if she's getting Park gifts to get her to like her or to poke at her. She started out wanting to see how deep Park's aversion to accepting charity went, and now she just wants to win. The box had a gift certificate for the spa. House recommends doing something she can't possibly reciprocate. "You gotta push her neuroses to the point where even she thinks she's crazy." House then gets Idea Face.

He takes out his cellphone and says, "One more favor. And then I promise I'll leave you alone forever. Or I'm lying." Anyway, here comes Thirteen. She finds Benjamin's wife, who's here to look at him and verify the kidney thing. "I wanted to spend my life with him. But I need to feel like he loves me more than other people. Like he loves our kids more. Maybe that's selfish. I should go." He turns his head a tiny amount to see her leave. It's all very sad.

Thirteen goes in to see Benjamin. He asks, "Was that my wife?" She ignores this. "Are you the guy? The kidney donor?" He is. He'll try again to give a kidney to the same lady. Thirteen spins a sad story about polycystic kidney disease (as opposed to all the happy stories about polycystic kidney disease, I guess) and Benjamin says he'll just donate both his kidneys and live on dialysis while they take all of his organs. She leaves, looking freaked out. Six feet from the room, in full view of Benjamin, she calls to report that Foreman's going to need a diagnostician. "This guy's ca-razy."

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House

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