Smallville
Crusade

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Down With Robot Clark

Clark in the caves. He's walked out. MamaKent is waiting for him there. He tells her she shouldn't have come. MamaKent is like, "Bitch, I’m your MOM!" She pulls the black Kryptonite from the container and jabs it right in Clark's chest. It goes purple. MamaKent tells him that if Clark's still in there, she loves him. Evil Robot Clark steps back. He screams and shakes. It's suddenly a Tool video up in here. A second Clark emerges from the first's body, and I have an awful Jonathan Taylor Thomas flashback. More CGI as Clark and Clark start to fight. The two Clarks do some extreme ultimate fighter championshipping. "Humanity has made you weak," one of the Clarks says to the other. No, I think that was all the scripts. MamaKent continues holding up the Kryptonite. She tosses it unconvincingly at the Clark who's getting his ass kicked. He catches it and sticks his fist into the other one's chest. Light spills out. A huge bright flash goes off, throwing MamaKent against a far wall.

Cut to Bo Duke, in his hospital bed, suddenly waking up. A nurse runs in just as it happens.

Cut back to Clark, shirtless but wearing jeans, on the cave floor. MamaKent apparently wasn't hurt, because she comes over to help him. His head lies on her lap. "It's me, Mom. I'm back," he says as the camera cranes out of there. Commercials.

More at the hospital. Bo Duke is in his hospital bed, but he sure seems healthy to me. In fact, he and MamaKent are making out like bunnies. I sure hope he brushed his teeth in between coming out of the coma and getting it on. Clark, in a white shirt, walks in and catches them. Clark asks what the doctors said about Bo's condition. Bo says he's a "breathing, walking miracle." Yeah, but what about your condition? Bo thanks Clark. Clark says that the real hero was MamaKent. Bo asks whether Clark remembers anything about being in the cave wall. Clark says he only remembers the last few days, and that's jumbled. Bo asks if Clark can fly. "Kal-El can fly," Clark says. "Clark Kent is still earthbound." Oh, well of course he is because...WHY!? Bo asks how it felt. "Amazing," Clark says, "and scary." Clark says that if he can do that, then maybe he's capable of anything. MamaKent says he is. "No, that's you, Mom," Clark says. MamaKent can FLY!? Clark says he doesn't know if he'd have had the strength to hold the family together as long as she did. MamaKent says that her dad used to say that life asks of you what you can handle. She says there were days she thought it had asked too much. MamaKent gives a lovely speech about how the family vibe is what pulled her through. She says she knew the three of them would be together again. The three of them hug. Hey, did somebody switch my show with Stolen Summer?

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Smallville

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