Episode 3

Episode Report Card
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Every Part & Aspect


Old Man: "Hey, reporter guy. Sorry I was so rude to you earlier."
Reporter: "Yeah, I know you're under a lot of pressure. Sorry to bug you."
Old Man: "We seem almost too considerate to be on this show. Now, I would love to tell you more soundbites about Ronnie, while he's on that TV screen racing some horse."
Ronnie: "I feel like everybody on this show is watching me. I bet something horrible is about to happen."


I don't know what horse Ronnie is riding, but it's not one of the two or three* that matter on the show. I was sternly reprimanded by somebody who takes fictional horses very seriously for getting this wrong in the recaplet, so instead of saying which horse it is, I will simply state for the record that: I do not care at all.

*(Is it three? It's like, I know the Old Man's horse is GUM, and I know that the Degens just bought MG from Cowboy, but also I thought that MG was the Gus/Ace horse and I know that's not right, so that's the third horse, which I still don't know the name of. Nor do I know who its daddy was, or How They Killed Him. Nor do I care, because most of these people took several episodes to get names, too -- the show doesn't give a shit if you're following any of this, so I feel only a certain amount of pressure to know what the fuck is going on. In any case, this horse Ronnie is riding is apparently not a big deal. Just some horse, I guess because practice makes perfect even for people as perfect as these tiny little jockeys seem to be.)

Ronnie: Snaps his collarbone, is the long and short.


Escalante: Quiet and weird, which is so preferable to loud and shitty like usual.
Jo: "We're apparently on a Break, so it would have been okay if you'd sent the Degens to some other vet with their horse."
Escalante: "Why would I do that?"
Jo: "You've been acting weird lately about me."
Escalante: "That's just my horrible personality!"
Jo: "Oh, okay then."

Escalante: "No, I want to be very clear about this. In the depths of my paranoia, I thought you were telling people secrets about whatever I was yelling about two episodes ago."
Jo, verbatim: "Oh, God! You are a sick fucking creature."
Escalante: "I mean, don't worry about it. I no longer think you did whatever it was."
Jo: "I'm not worried, I just look like this when I'm about to barf because I realize I'm dating a sadsack asshole who might have paranoid schizophrenia on top of being a dicknose."

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