Euphoria, Part I

Episode Report Card
admin: B- | 1 USERS: A+
Staff Infection

Cuddy steps in the room, looking about as bored by House's antics as Foreman claims to be, and says, simply, this: "I can't even imagine the backwards logic you used to rationalize shooting a corpse." House says he thought that shooting a live person would have been more trouble for everyone, although I'd think there are a few people he wouldn't mind being able to put a bullet or two in. Cuddy asks how she's supposed to explain this to the corpse's family, who will certainly find it odd that the guy they thought died of cancer has a bullet wound. House says the guy donated his body to science, and he thinks this is a much better end for it than having to "spend the next year letting first-year med students use the carpool lane." And while that does sound icky on the part of the med students, there are quite a few times in my day that I would be desperate enough to stick a corpse in my car if it meant not having to sit in traffic and turn into one myself. Foreman and Chase enter the booth, and say that the body is ready for its MRI of DOOOM!, which I guess can't be all that deadly this time since the guy is already dead. Cuddy tries to order House not to turn the MRI on, but he won't listen.

The machine turns on, and immediately there are some very bad thumping sounds and the lights start flashing. In a particularly nasty scene, the corpse's head lifts off of the pad as the metal bullet fragments pull out of it through his forehead and go flying through the roof of the MRI. In the booth, the lights have turned red and flash a few more times before the MRI shuts down with a groan. Cuddy turns to House and stares at him, her "I fucking TOLD YOU SO" expression evident even in the dark red lighting. "My bad," House shrugs. Foreman and Chase stand against the back wall and think about how that was probably one of the coolest things they've ever seen, although they're not too thrilled about the fact that their boss is like an stubborn eight-year-old when it comes to testing the limits of things.

Apparently, House and the Cottages were then sent to their offices, where they all sit around looking like chastised children in time out. Chase enters the room, and notifies everyone that the MRI of DOOOM! will be out of commission for the next few weeks. I'm just glad it isn't totally broken. What would I do without it? Other than Evil Nurse Brenda, it's the only regular villain this show has! And how fitting was it that it turned everything red like the depths of hell when it broke? I love the MRI of DOOOM! House doesn't really care, since they obviously can't use it on their patient. Cameron points out that PPTH does have other doctors and patients who would have liked to be able to use the MRI, to which House's reaction is a predictable lack of caring and consideration. Meanwhile, Foreman's wondering whether they can just not do anything at all and hope that the clot breaks up on its own. House is all for getting out of working, but not when it comes to his patients. House orders an echocardiogram, hoping that they'll find the source of Joe's clot in his heart and treat it, since they can't treat the clot itself. The Cottages go off to do this, and House casts another suspicious look in Foreman's direction when he walks past.

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