Episode Report Card
admin: B- | Grade It Now!
The Yips

The Magic Schoolbus Cam shows up for the bone marrow transplant sequence. Foreman is the one performing the operation, which makes perfect sense, since he's a neurologist.

House comes home and finds his front door open. "Oh, goodness! I left my door open! My poor dog must've run away and been hit by a car or a truck or a train!" And then, because he apparently live in Looney Tunes land, he adds, "Or an anvil!" I love that House felt the need to say all this out loud, just in case anyone was there to hear him. But I'm even more in love with the fact that Hector is still there, eating something of House's that probably cost a ton. House's stereo, on the other hand, is not in love with Hector. Ha ha ha! That's what you get for trying to kill a cute dog instead of trying to, like, train it. It would've been pretty great, though, if House had come back and everything in his apartment was gone except the dog. He got off pretty easy losing just the stereo. House slams the door shut using that horrible geriatric cane with the little feet on the bottom that he's been reduced to using since his regular cane broke. House walks to the bathroom and closes the door behind him. We hear Hector whine from being hit in the face with a door. House smiles. I guess since he didn't intend to hit the dog that time, House isn't a totally irredeemable animal abuser.

Cameron goes to check on Matty, who finds it odd that they don't know what's wrong with him, but he'll be fine. They do know what's wrong with Nick, and he's going to die. And Matty can't even go in to see Nick on what he's sure is his brother's deathbed, no matter how many times Cameron tries to convince him that Nick will be okay. I wouldn't believe her either. Hell, I wouldn't believe anyone at a hospital that thought that making me sicker was a great idea and then almost took one of my heart valves out for no reason. Matty complains that his ear is itching. Cameron checks it out and finds blood dripping out of it. Well, that's just great.

House meets Wilson in some kind of weird antique shop. House is careful to stick a Holmes-esque pipe in his mouth for a second just to get all the Holmes-is-House people scribbling furiously in their notebooks. Wilson asks House why House said to meet him here. House says that he wants a new cane, and he thinks that Wilson should pay for it, since it was his dog who chewed up the old one. Wilson reminds House that House yelled at him and called him a coward and hurt his widdle feewings. And you know why he did that, Wilson? Because he can. He can say mean things to you and make you feel like shit, and then when he wants a favor from you, you do it. Every. Time. It's only when Wilson is pretending to head out of the shop that House apologizes, and only because he wants the free cane. Wilson chooses to believe that House is sincere, though. House takes a call from Cameron saying that Matty is bleeding out of his ears, then goes back to shopping. Because why try to help Matty when there are items to purchase? House tells Wilson that he buys his canes here because they have "bitchin' choices." A clerk finally decides to do his job and comes out to the floor to show House the very bitchin'est of canes. The first one has a skull on it. House rejects it, saying it's "a little too 'Marilyn Manson in a retirement home.'" Isn't Marilyn Manson already in a retirement home? House likes the second choice until he finds out it's made of bull penises. "Penis canes are murder," House says, handing it back. Okay, why isn't that on a T-shirt right now? While House waits for the cute clerk to bring him a third choice, he tells Wilson that Matty might be the one who dies now if they can't figure out what's wrong with him. But who cares about Matty when AC/DC chords greet the third cane, which House pronounces is properly bitchin'?

Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12Next





Get the most of your experience.
Share the Snark!

See content relevant to you based on what your friends are reading and watching.

Share your activity with your friends to Facebook's News Feed, Timeline and Ticker.

Stay in Control: Delete any item from your activity that you choose not to share.

The Latest Activity On TwOP