The next day, House has to answer to Wilson, who asks House how depressed he was to go to such lengths for the trial drug. "I was curious," House replies. "Are you curious about heroin?" Wilson asks with perfect sarcasm and exasperation. "Not since last year's Christmas party!" says House. You mean the one House had by himself? House asks Wilson if they can "not make too much of this." Uh...yeah. Sure. "You made people think you were going to die!" Wilson starts, before House interrupts that he didn't want anyone to find out about the fake cancer. That's why he didn't tell anyone. But they all went snooping around in his private life anyway, and thought they figured it out. He has a point there, although you can't tell me that House didn't relish some of the attention he got when people found out about the cancer -- specifically from Cameron's lips and Cuddy's ass. Hey, wasn't there an episode of Three's Company where everyone thought Jack was dying? And if so, who's the Don Knotts -- Wilson or Chase? To House's surprise, Wilson busts out laughing. He says that the terminal cancer patients who get depressed are usually the ones with no family or friends. That depression drives them to do stuff like marrying Cameron. House, on the other hand, does have friends. He doesn't have cancer. He faked it and pushed away the people who cared about him. "Because they're boring," says House. Wilson says that if House is looking for happiness, he can start by having pizza with a friend before he goes for the drug in his brain. He gives House time to invite Wilson out for pizza, but House totally doesn't, so Wilson leaves.
Later, Patrick is awake. House does a few neurological tests on him. Patrick can't speak, but House says that he will probably regain that ability in time as his remaining brain compensates for the missing stuff. A disappointed and guilty Dad says that Patrick hasn't done anything yet to make him think the surgery was worth it. House starts saying that it'll take time, and then looks over at Patrick and stops. Patrick's fumbling with the buttons on his pajamas. Dad moves to help him, but House stops him with his cane. As they watch, Patrick buttons the shirt up himself. Dad is thrilled. Patrick smiles. "He looks happy," says House, oh so jealous. I don't get why House thinks it's a good idea to cut off a useless part of someone's brain, but won't take off the useless leg that causes him constant pain.