I Have The Advantage…For Once

Episode Report Card
admin: C+ | Grade It Now!
Take Your Teeth And Go

Next, the contestants receive massages, and Yul is surprised that Ozzy has never had one before. "Oh, you're in for a treat," Yul says. Probably to Ozzy, but conceivably to the woman massaging him. Yul calls the massage "a nice reminder of life outside of this game." Well, seriously. There will be family and friends and massages no matter what happens. On the other hand, this is how you know Yul isn't really made for this game: he is capable of imagining a happy life with or without victory. Parvati says that after this complete reset, she can certainly last another five days.

Exile Island. Adam has flies on his feet. Ew. He's basically just lying in the sun, baking. As often happens, I just sit here thinking about sunblock. He tells us that it hurts to be on Exile Island, instead of being with Parvati where he can "strategize." He says that he hopes Parvati can find a way to break apart the Aitu four. Keep hoping, kid. He breaks open a giant shell and says that he has no need for fire, because he can eat things raw. That shot of some piece of whatever it is dangling out of his mouth is really, really unappetizing. Maybe he needed a fire after all. A storm follows. Adam says that this experience was "awful," what with the rain pouring down and so forth. He will fight on!

At the spa, Parvati says she feels like she's in a dream. Yul is in the shower or something, because Parvati's just talking to Ozzy as they sit at the table in their robes. Ozzy tells her that she's where he has sometimes felt like he was, in that she has to win or she's going home. Parvati interviews that "Ozzy's kind of a loner" and that "it's kind of hard to get to know him." But, she says, "he's opened up to [her] a little bit." Uh-oh. Red light! Red light! Red light! Don't sleep with him! Sigh. Too late, I know. They eat dinner, as Parvati tells us that she's trying to be as "charming" as possible. Oy. And as they're eating, the lights suddenly go out. "All right, build a fire, Ozzy," Yul immediately deadpans. Ha! He's so cute. Ozzy tells us that having to light a bunch of candles actually led to a pretty nice "ambience." They are treated to a show with drumming and dancers. "It was, like, way better than dinner and a movie," says Parvati. She also says that she had some champagne and wine, and then they got in the hot tub, and she was naked. I'm not sure whether the boys are totally naked or not at first, but then Ozzy offers to show her "the Great Cook Islands Humpback Whale," and shows his ass as he goes over the side of one hot tub into another. Drunk Parvati looks way more amused than Substantially Less Drunk Yul. "I just peed in my pants and I wasn't even wearing any," she says. Wow. That's drunk. When you're going for "charming" and you're talking about peeing in the water, that is drunk. Yul says he's not sure whether Parvati's flirtation with Ozzy is strictly strategic or not, but that he's aware that Ozzy is "reciprocating" somewhat. Clearly, Yul does not see this as a good development. "I've got two naked guys in the hot tub!" Parvati says happily. Yul points out that she is also naked, and she agrees, but adds, "The numbers are in my favor. At least this once." Ozzy tells us that he's looking out for himself. Maybe, maybe not, dude. "I might play the game with Parvati while there's still the opportunity," he adds. I'm not even sure what that means, or how gross it is.

Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11Next





Get the most of your experience.
Share the Snark!

See content relevant to you based on what your friends are reading and watching.

Share your activity with your friends to Facebook's News Feed, Timeline and Ticker.

Stay in Control: Delete any item from your activity that you choose not to share.

The Latest Activity On TwOP