Little Monsters

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Little Monsters

What's this? Oh, my God! It's a dank, forbidding alleyway! Hooray! I think I can even make out a few Convenient Shipping Pallets Of Grave Bodily Injury lurking in the background, ready to pounce. Aw, guys. Sniff. You shouldn't have. Piper crouches behind a pile of fetid trash, anxiously eyeing whatever it is that's unleashing those tormented howls of agony and distress we hear on the soundtrack. Raige orbs in with Phoebe, and the two tiptoe across puddles of filth to join their sister. "Let's vanquish this demon!" Raige enthuses. "Eh," Piper notes with more than a hint of distaste coloring her tone, "he beat us to the punch," and the shot shifts to take in the reptilian monster currently snacking on the aforementioned demon's entrails. The monster paws through the demon's sucking chest wound for a bit to extract something we don't see, and places that something in a small pouch. The demon's head drops to one side, and his body presently disintegrates down through the pavement, presumably on its way to The Waste Land. The monster rises to its feet as Raige hisses, "What is it?" Piper doesn't want to hang around long enough to learn the answer to that question, and the three back up slowly to orb out. Unfortunately, they make a bit of a racket doing so, and the monster super-speeds to their end of the alleyway to hurl Phoebe and Raige backwards through the air into yet another pile of trash. Piper deploys the Hands of Discontent, then shrieks in fright when the resulting mojo explodes harmlessly on the surface of the monster's skin. It does seem to stun the thing momentarily, though, so she flings her Hands a few more times while backing away in an attempt to flee. Phoebe urgently calls for Raige to "do something." Raige spots an appropriately battered transformer above and behind Piper's head and shouts, "Power lines!" One of said lines breaks free from its base in a shower of sparks, and proceeds to flail through the air until its active end makes contact with the monster's head. The monster screams and shrieks while jittering about before exploding in a spray of flame.

Phoebe and Raige leap to their feet to scuttle to Piper's side. Once they confirm she's okay, their attention's diverted by the grunting sounds emanating from a bundle the monster's left behind. The Glamorous Ladies edge down the alleyway to the pile of burlap rags. Piper kneels, gingerly lifts one end of fabric, and discovers a chubby little red-haired infant wriggling about beneath the covering. The redheaded stepchild shocks the Ps when it playfully shoots a forked snake's tongue out of its mouth while in mid-squirm. "Cute," Raige sarcastically notes, with much wrinkling of disgusted nose. The camera cuts back to the redheaded stepchild for one more flicker of his forked tongue before licking its way into the opening credits.

Big Gay Chris is back! And Darryl! Yay! Pity the latter gets an utterly pointless subplot this evening, but it's nice to know both of the boys are alive and well.

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