Smallville

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admin: A | 1 USERS: A-
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Para-Lionel Universe

Clark, thinking that this Tess is his hot sister/lover Tess, gives her the credit for finding the mirror box and bringing them both there. Only when he goes to look out the window does she let the fear show on her face. Clark marvels at how little sign there is of Lionel in this world. "It's refreshing, actually," he says, "being out from under our father's shadow." Tess gapes for a moment, then quickly gets herself under control. She tells him that Lex killed Lionel years ago, which amuses him quite a bit. He makes the Lex of his reality sound sort of incompetent. More incompetent than the Lex we know, even. "I gotta tell ya, Sis, this world is a blast," he says. "Doesn't feel right, though, not having blood on my hands before lunch." Wait till after lunch; that way you don't have to wash your hands twice. [So does he actually need someone to commit a crime to kill them, or are some people just victims of the time of day? - Z] Tess struggles for a split second not to show how disturbed she is. "That's the great thing about us being on our own now," she says. "You can have lunch whenever you want." You can even have brunch. If you're very lucky, the restaurant will have an omelet bar with an array of cheeses. Clark says something sexy about being hungry, but Tess's turn to the good side prevents her from offering him a nibble. She makes some excuse about being watched here. This lack of sexual appetite seems to make him suspicious. He narrows his eyes at her. "Where's the box, Tess?" Heh. Heh. Ahem. Tess must have the fortitude of a saint, because Clark's all sprawled out on the sofa by this point, looking like about eight miles of arms and legs. Woof. He says he wants to destroy the box so that they can't be sent back home. She makes plans to meet him later at the mansion to, you know, bring him her box. This seems to satisfy him somewhat, because he agrees to this plan and gives her a hot, open-mouth stare while he's at it. As he gets up to go, he promises, "This world won't know what hit it."

For the obligatory comic relief, we join Lois as she waits in line at the coffee shop. Her phone rings, but when she sees the call is from Tess, she pointedly doesn't answer. "Oh, no, you are not going to ruin this gal's afternoon off," she says. Didn't this gal want to be part of the super team? There are no afternoons off. When it's her turn in line, she orders a cup of plain, black coffee. The barista grumps at her oh-so-extravagant order. Lois makes a snide comment about him under her breath, which he hears. As an apology, she stuffs three bucks into the tip jar. A moment later, when she tries to use her debit card to pay for the coffee, it's declined for insufficient funds. Lois tries to take back her tip, either out of spite or to pay for her purchase. Either way, it's kind of a rude move. While this is going on, the guy in line behind her gets a call on his cell. It's for Lois, to both their surprise. It's Tess: "If I'm calling you, Lane, it's for a reason." "How are you doing this?" Lois asks. "Look to your left," Tess tells her. Lois looks to her right. "Your other left," Tess suggests helpfully. HAR HAR. Dumbness is funny! Lois sees a video camera on a nearby signpost. Tess, watching her from Watchtower, tells her they have a problem.

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Smallville

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