Neanderthal Man

Episode Report Card
admin: B+ | Grade It Now!
Sucking At Puzzles

The moon wanders off and is replaced by the sun of Day 19, and we are now swooping over some trees and landing at Koror. Camp Koror, it turns out, not only offers merengue lessons and daiquiris on the terrace at 4:30 PM on the nose, but it is extravagantly decorated with the rotting, bug-infested shark head that Tom landed last week. Of course, what's interesting about that is that Tom has consistently said that he emerged as a leader somewhat reluctantly, sort of in spite of the fact that he'd rather have hung back a little bit more. Hanging the shark head up in triumph like you're waving the undies in Sixteen Candles doesn't really jibe with that particular analysis. In any event, the biggest problem is that the shark head, predictably, is now swarming with flies. And equally unpleasantly, the camp is apparently crawling with nice, friendly rats. We watch as a rat enjoys a meal of abandoned coconut, only to find itself snapped at by Katie, sitting up on a table and watching the rats from a safe distance. So that's her purpose -- she's heading up the Ministry of Rodent Scolding. Tom and Gregg discuss the fact that the rats have apparently become bold, and are no longer afraid of the tribe. Gee, I wonder what made the rats think the members of Koror weren't ruthless, nature-battling warriors. Maybe it was the hammocks. Tom interviews that he's not sure if it's because the team is getting sloppy or what, but that the rats really seem to be having a field day at the moment. He personally just chalks it up to the miscellaneous emboldening of rats.

Coby, on the other hand, finds the rats' increased friendliness to be an obvious sign that other people are inadequate. Go figure. "It's all our tribe's fault, because nobody will listen to me," he snots, nicely summing up his philosophy of life in one shot. He mentions that the tribe is leaving food everywhere, so they should only expect that the rats are going to become more aggressive: "Every bit of rat that we get all over us is deserved." Seriously, people, it's like they've offended God. Coby has a chat with Caryn in which he declares that it's all the shark head's fault that there are all these flies, so he's moving it. Also, the shark head apparently is not smelling so fresh, for something that's being kept right close to camp. Apparently the advanced preservation method of hanging it from a stick isn't going as well as everyone would hope. Coby interviews that he's asked Tom repeatedly to move the shark head, and Tom hasn't done it. Coby then goes into a more general bitch session about how he's the one who does all the work around camp, keeping the fire going and making everything awesome and all that jazz. His beef, it turns out, is with "those girls," who don't do any work. He's pissed at Anonymous Jen, Katie, and Janu, all of whom he has weighed in the balance and found worthless. He blames Katie and Anonymous Jen for just sitting around, and now Janu has been boo-hooing for several days about wanting to quit. Which Coby thinks she should just do already and get on with it. And in my favorite moment, Coby says, "I'm too much of a feminist to watch this happen." Oh, I'm so happy to know he's acting out of concern for me. I thought he was just being a negative, obnoxious, bratty little punk. Clearly not, though. He goes on to complain that the guys are "waiting on" the women, and the women love it: "I want to take all three of those girls and push them in that fire." Wow, he really is a feminist. Nothing says "I love your kind" like "I want to see most of you reduced to a greasy ash pile."

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