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Brotherly Lust

"Hello, Lana!" Chloe says cheerfully as she comes into The Talon and greets her roomie. Lana asks if she wants an almond mocha with extra whip. Chloe asks for an extra shot of caffeine. She says she's in her post-lunch, pre-deadline coma. I hear ya, Chloe. Chloe finds Clark's job application. She wonders why Clark didn't put her as a reference. Lana says she's not gonna hire him anyway. She asks if it isn't weird for Chloe to be his supervisor at The Torch. On the contrary, Chloe says that bossing Clark around is the highlight of her day. Chloe says that Clark always comes through, even if it's in his own special Clark Time. Lana says that's what she's worried about. Chloe fingers her green earring and says that Clark could easily do the coffee job. Chloe says there's another reason Lana doesn't want him there. "I...I...uh..." Lana sputters, turning her head in about twelve different directions. I'm really beginning to think that a Lana Lang bobblehead figure would be redundant. "That's what I thought," Chloe says. And the scene ends with Lana smiling and pursing her lips, MamaKent-style.

House of Lexxin'. Lex bursts in to confront Papa Luthor about why his bank assets might be frozen. Papa Luthor says he's tired of Lex's constant mutiny. Lex says he didn't have many options. It was mutiny or walking the plank. Arrrrrr, matey! Papa Luthor -- who's wearing his favorite new toy, a phone earpiece -- says that Lex shouldn't have used all of his assets as collateral. Now that Lex's company is a LuthorCorp holding, all of Lex's stuff belong to Papa Luthor. Uh oh. Even Clark's heart? "I want you out of the mansion," Papa Luthor says. Lex panics a little and asks if this isn't just futile. Lex says that he and Lucas will be back home after they vote Papa Luthor out. Lex turns around, and there's Lucas telling him not to be so sure about that. Double crossa'! Papa Luthor says they had a father-son chat, and that some sons don't ever question their allegiance to the family. Lex smiles ruefully and tells Lucas that he's being naive if he thinks he can trust Papa Luthor. Lucas says that when you're at the table (the betting table, I think -- not, for instance, a dinner or massage table), you size up your options, and sometimes you have to change your strategy. Lucas has some serious caterpillar eyebrows going. "Well, Lex, looks like you lose," Papa Luthor says, with relish and with mustard.

Kent house. Clark is coming down the stairs and hears a knock at the door. They need a "Mooooo!" doorbell. Bo Duke is reading a magazine and MamaKent is checking out the paper. They didn't hear someone drive up? It's Lex. Clark asks if everything is all right. "No. It's not," Lex replies. Lex says that according to his dad, he's no longer a Luthor. Lex has been left with nothing -- not even a place to live. He could probably buy a condo in Smallville just with the clothes he's wearing. Lex asks if he can stay with the Kents for a while. A thousand fanfic writers go, "Hey, that was my idea!" Lex looks suitably embarrassed. Bo Duke's brain just blew a fuse.

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