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Promblems

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"Who's your daddy" isn't necessarily a rhetorical question

Chem class. Lily, instead of getting a real job, has gotten involved in a pyramid sales scheme. She gives a sales pitch to her fellow students -- who are clearly feeling very uncomfortable for her -- to get them to buy organic gardening soap. "Hillcrest organically removes grime in a colorful array of natural scents," says Lily, her voice breaking as the class barely hides their pity, "including pine, lemon and spiced lemon." Josh raises his hand and offers to buy 100 bars. Lily is all "we can't afford it" and apologizes to the class for subjecting them to her pathetic sales presentation. Carmen tries to encourage Lily by buying some soap. "What a great deal!" gushes Carmen. "Because, you know, I love anything that's spiced apple." Now if those soaps only came in BBQ or sour-cream-and-onion flavors... "You don't garden, Carm" says Lily, starting to cry. Carmen lies that she was planning to start. Sam and Brooke buy soap too, pretending to be recent gardening aficionados themselves. Chem points out that Lily has to sell 700 more bars of soap in order to pay their rent -- which is already a month late. Josh is all, "Back off, we're just getting started." Chem is all, "Landlords, grocers, and phone companies are unimpressed with the phrase, 'We're just getting started.'"

The orphanage. Mary Cherry, wearing what appears to be a Little Orphan Annie-style red dress from Mark Jacobs, and a bunch of girls who all resemble Pepsi spokesperson Hallie Kate Eisenberg scrub the floors on their knees while lip-synching to Jay-Z's "Hard Knock Life" which as you all know contains a sample of "It's a Hard Knock Life" from the Annie soundtrack. It's all terribly meta. Over the loudspeaker comes an announcement that Mary Cherry's mother is here. Mary Cherry is elated, thinking that Cherry Cherry has changed her mind. Her visitor turns out to be RuPaul in drag. "I'm your daddy," he says appearing in the doorway. And that's it for RuPaul's appearance on tonight's Popular. I guess he just didn't have time to do any more scenes, what with Hollywood Squares demanding all of his creative efforts. Isn't that funny? A drag queen is Mary Cherry's father! You see, drag queens are just so shocking and underground, so a five-second cameo by RuPaul is enough to resolve this Mary Cherry plotline, even though it's the last we see of her. Do they get along? Does Ru take her out of the orphanage? We never find out. But RuPaul is her daddy. And that's funny. Geddit?

Kennedy hallway. Nicole and George agree on some final details for their prom date, and George exits. Brooke enters and goes off on Nicole for creating conflict between her and Sam. Nicole walks off. Brooke follows her into the Novak and demands to know why she said those evil things. Nicole replies that she's insulted that Brooke is going to the prom with Sam instead of her. Brooke points out that Sam is her sister, and orders Nicole to go apologize to her and break her date with George. Nicole points out that she no longer has to rely on her friendship with Brooke to have any power, and tells her to go to hell. "You're corrupt to the core," says Brooke. "You'll never change!" She announces that their friendship is over. Nicole vows to steal Harrison from both Sam and Brooke. They slap each other. "You will not go to the prom with George," says Brooke. "I will see to that." "If you actually think I'm frightened that you've decided to throw your weight around," says Nicole, "go step on a scale."

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