Shut Up, Maile

Episode Report Card
admin: F | Grade It Now!
I Hate You Guys So Much

The girls hug people from the radio station. I also get filled with a warm feeling because I just got past seven minutes of tape on this show. Every minute is another personal triumph.

The girls get back in the van to go to New York's WB affiliate. We get a triple screen of the outside of the van and tall buildings before Maile tells us that they are late for this appointment. Ivette turns and asks where the entrance to the building is. The drama!

They're going to be on "The T.V." this time, so they have to get themselves pretty. Ana Maria has borrowed Nicole's stupid hat and is running around with a cell phone. Nicole voice-overs these words of wisdom: "You can't help but be conscious that the whole country is like, watching you and you're like, 'I hope I don't sound stupid.'" Wait, don't laugh yet. Ivette's got something to say, too: "My biggest concern? Is looking stupid on T.V. To be honest." I guess they haven't seen the show yet.

The girls are on-air now. The interviewer fucks up Maile's name. Some of them are wearing the same clothes they wore on KTLA. The interviewer asks what it's like to be in a house all the time together. Ana Maria has been assigned the answer to this one, and says her script just fine. They are in a house in California. They are very busy. They have a great time. The interviewer then makes them all stand up and teach her some dance moves. It seems pretty easy to pick up since it's just swaying back and forth with your arms open, but DruggyNicole seems to be swaying a bit farther than the other girls.

Someone tells the girls to go change. This was important because -- why, now?

Outside Rosanna tells us she thinks it went well. What went well? What is happening? This is so dumb, this episode. Nothing. Is. Happening. They agree that the interview was "short and sweet" and now they're headed to "the YM shoot."

More driving. Shot of the Broadway sign for no reason at all. Buildings are tall in New York. That's what we've learned in this episode.

The girls are in robes. Maile is starting to crash from whatever drug she was on earlier. They're getting into hair and makeup for the photo shoot, but Access Hollywood stops them in the middle for an interview. In a split screen Ana Maria says that they get asked a lot of the same questions in interviews. Wow. Isn't that life-altering information?

The girls shoot seven pictures in front of a closed refrigerator. They pout and jut out their asses. Now the girls are jumping on a bed for some reason as the narrator tells us: "But the hectic schedule has finally caught up with the girls." Huh? It'd be much more interesting to talk about how insulting it is to have them pout around a refrigerator. But who cares what I think?

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