The Birds & The Batteries

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The Birds & The Batteries

Brown House. Treat and Nina -- Nina! For moral support! -- have seated Delia in the living room. She asks if this is going to take a long time, because she's got long division waiting upstairs. Treat tells Delia that she's at an age where she's curious about things -- personal things. Delia: "You mean sex?" Hee. Treat stammers, "Sex. Yeah, sex." Delia says she already knows what sex is. Oh, I'm sure you do, Delia, and I'm also sure that, in your eleven-year-old mind, it involves urine somehow. Treat tells Delia that it's natural to have questions, and it's okay to come to him or Nina if she needs answers. Delia says that's good, because she has a question: "That thing I found under your bed? Was that for sex?" Treat and Nina exchange looks. Treat says, "You know how you have long division waiting for you upstairs?" Hee. Delia tells her dad not to change the subject. Treat's all, "Work with me, here." He tells Delia that the year before, she wasn't ready for long division, because she didn't even know what it was. But she does now, because she's old enough to understand. Some things, Treat says, you just have to be older to understand, or you get confused. Delia says that makes sense. Strummy happy la-la plays as Delia asks her dad what's the difference between "making love" and "having sex." We fade to black as Treat starts to explain. Hey, I have a question. Wouldn't this be the perfect time for some good old-fashioned Irv narration? BRING IT BACK, BERLANTI.

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