The Final Four: No Regrets

Episode Report Card
admin: B- | Grade It Now!
Fallen Comrats

As the S3 stumble upon the third part of the ritual, three Kenyans in red robes greet the S3 and make them kneel. The Masai tribesmen rub their temples and then make the S3 get on their feet again. The throwing of the goat fat and blood is not nearly as fun as it could have been; then, suddenly, other Africans dressed in red start popping out from nearby hiding places and creeping toward the S3. It's kind of disturbing, actually, but then they start jumping in rows in front of Lex Loser, Kimj, and Ethan. The dancers put necklaces around the necks of the S3 and continue dancing. It looks like one of the men is rubbing some shit into Kimj face; it probably makes her feel comfortable and reminds her of the Mofo Maji watering hole. Then the S3 join in the jumping, and Kimj has a really hard time with it. If her feet left the ground at any point, I missed it. Lex Loser and Ethan, though, have the whole jumping thing down. Then the S3 join hands with the other dancers, and they all start skipping around. They also stand in a line and jut their necks forward and back. Everyone would have far more enjoyed Big Tom's participation in this, so the S3 suck for voting him out and depriving the viewing audience of such hilarity. Close-up clips of the S3 show that Lex Loser is way into it (perhaps mistaking this ritual for some sort of communion with the devil); Ethan is fairly passive; and Kimj is about to pass out. But then a slow motion of Ethan makes him look orgasmic, which I'm sure resulted in much mockery from his friends back home. Finally, they manage to get a shot of each of the S3 looking happy -- as opposed to manic, bored, and dying -- and then the ritual is finished.

The S3 hobble over to where Just Peachy is waiting for them, next to a pole. Peachy says that the last challenge will come down to one thing: will power. He asks, "How. Badly. Do you. Want this?" and explains that it's a test of endurance. Each Mofo Maji member will place one hand on a giant immunity idol and each foot on a raised stump. Once hands and feet are committed to a spot, they can't be moved. Whoever lasts the longest gets a spot in the final two and -- just as importantly -- gets to choose who goes along for the ride. Peachy advises the S3 to remember to "keep [their] feet on the wood and be careful with [their] hands." He blathers on further about not losing contact and maintaining concentration before proclaiming, "The game is on!" I guess he's learned that "Let's get it on!" was scaring the more delicate tribe members.

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