The Friendly Skies

Episode Report Card
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Please extinguish all smoking nurses

We fade into Karen and Skeet walking over to where the plane is being studied by that Garcia guy, who's complaining about "de-oxygenated water" and "no tungsten in the light bulbs" and wondering how he's supposed to put that in the report, and I guess maybe the water had been dreaming about being oxygen-less and the light bulbs were sick of having tungsten. And as Karen and Skeet walk by, she says, conspicuously loudly, "I want to show you where it happened while I still can," and then she's loudly talking about a big flash of light above the wing. And Skeet tells the guard to "get Garcia -- he should hear this," and I'm not sure the guard would leave his post on Skeet's say-so, but he does, so Karen and Skeet make a break for the door, with the guards quickly giving chase.

And now it's dark outside as the two of them run across the tarmac to the airport. They can see Mark inside but can't find a door in, so Karen bangs on the window and yells at her husband. But it's bright inside, so Mark can't see outside. And I guess the windows are shock-absorbing and soundproof too, as he doesn't hear her screaming or banging the window -- and at one point he looks right in their direction. But a jeep full of G.I. Joes pulls up and yanks Skeet and Karen away, Mark completely unaware, as he strolls over to the window, peering outside. All that's left is a perfectly formed handprint painted on the window.

The autopsy. Crispy critter. We hear this crinkling noise as the assistant tells the doctor to "look at this." The doctor watches as the blackened, charred left arm quickly returns to its healthy, pink, raw self. "This is interesting," he says. Dude, put the heart back in. Now. Commercials.

On a television screen in the airport, the helpful media correspondent is letting us know that terrorist activity on the flight is being ruled out, but there was one death due to a fire in the lavatory.

And a completely unburned nurse with a Y-cut right down her chest lies on the table. Charlie's all, you mean she'd be alive right now if it weren't for the autopsy? And the doctor says there's no way to tell for sure, and Charlie's all, dude, I told the media someone was killed in a fire in the lavatory. "And now we have an almost perfectly restored body. Difficult to explain that," says Keel. Charlie hits on a remarkably simple solution: "Burn her," he says. And I guess everyone who felt sorriest for Deanna must have missed any of the scenes involving the nurse who BURNED TO DEATH and then would have come back to life had she not already been DISSECTED IN AN AUTOPSY and now her CORPSE IS BEING DESECRATED and yeah, who got off worse, Deanna who briefly had a flash of her mundane future, or the crispy cut-up defiled nurse here? Yeah, sure is a toss-up to me too.

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