Smallville
Tomb

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Commercials. Woo, a snowboarding commercial! That totally goes with what we were just watching!

Crapilogue. It's the barn. With Clark and Lana. Just...just kill me. Please. Do it quickly. Back of the head. But first, tell me about the rabbits. Stick a Kryptonite bracelet in my neck or something. "Hey!" Lana says as she walks toward Clark. He "hey"s her back. "Chloe told me what happened," she says. That must have been a fun conversation. What did you guys tell the doctor? Or the police? Clark asks how Chloe's doing. Lana says she's fine, considering that she was possessed and almost chopped up by a psychotic orderly. Clark asks Lana why she went to Lex. She asks him why he didn't tell her he broke Chloe out of the Psych ward. You two? On a break! Just...stop talking. You know that moment when it just stops being fun being a couple for months at a time? That means you shouldn't be a couple anymore. Lana tells Clark that they should come together because that's what couples do when these things happen. You mean when a Kryptonite bracelet makes a ghost possess your friend and get tied up in a basement? Yes, that's something every couple has to face. Clark asks why they didn't do that. "I love you," Lana says. BREAK! You're on a break! That you requested! Gaaaah! Lana says that she loves Clark with all her heart, but that she doesn't know how to talk to him anymore. Why not stop trying? Clark moves his mouth, but doesn't say anything. He forgot how to talk, too. "I guess we all have our secrets," Lana says. For the forty billionth time. I'm going to make a macro for recapping barn scenes because they're all the fucking same.

Kent home. MamaKent is on the couch. She asks how the tractor's coming. Clark thinks he's got it working. He says he's not as handy with a set of tools as Bo Duke was. Nor with a platitude. Or the cows. They're all sexually frustrated and lonely now. "There's an awful lot of your father in you," MamaKent says. Yeah. Awful. "I hope so," Clark says. Clark sees some of the papers MamaKent is examining. He asks if she understands all that stuff. MamaKent reminds him that she was a "corporate animal" once. Rrowwwr. Clark says that's not hard to believe. He thinks she can do whatever she sets her mind to. Maybe he does have the gift of platitude! Clark tells MamaKent that she should take the senate seat. MamaKent shakes her head and says she can't. She worries that she can't run the farm and be in the senate. Clark says that he can take over the farm. He's just going to need some topseed. And...uh...grain hops. And what's that stuff you put in the ground? Cornmeal? Flax? Barleys? Don't you worry, Ma. Clark plays the Bo card, saying says it's what Bo would have wanted. "I never was one to disappoint a Kent boy," MamaKent says. I sure hope that that line didn't have any dirty implications because...ugh. Smiles all around. MamaKent looks excited all of a sudden. The senate! Woo!

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Smallville

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