Suck It, Football: Finally, nerds have something to monopolize their entire Sunday the same as the jocks as TNT is airing all three Lord of the Rings movies, back-to-back-to-back. We're not hating, those movies were awesome. They're not short movies, as you may recall, so settle in for eleven and a half hours (!!) of ugly hobbit feet and pretty lady Orlando Bloom. (TNT, 11:30 AM)

Suck It, Everything That's Not Football: Only three weeks left in the NFL season, and this week promises a whole mess of snow-covered matchups. All the attention is on the New England Cheating Patriots preparing to fricassee the New York Whistleblowing Jets, but the truly discerning fan will be seeking out the Browns versus Bills matchup, which has actual playoff implications for a pair of teams who haven't made the playoffs in a long, long time. (CBS, 1 PM)

Don't Watch This: MTV's running with a marathon of A Shot At Love With Tila Tequila. Thank God there's a show that makes us all feel better for watching I Love New York 2.  (MTV, 1 PM)

Rhapsody Still Has Two Mommies: If it's been more than a month or two since you've seen Christopher Guest's Best In Show, here's your chance to replenish yourself. Watch it with a loved one you met at across-the-street Starbuckses, perhaps. (HBO Signature, 4 PM)

We Have To Admit We're Curious: SciFi is airing The Poseidon Adventure this evening. No, not the original with Gene Hackman and Shelley Winters. And no, not last year's Poseidon remake that bombed spectacularly but at least featured hotties like Josh Lucas and Mike Vogel to look at. Apparently there was another one, starring (get this): Adam Baldwin, Rutger Hauer, Steve Guttenberg, and C. Thomas Howell. On the bright side, at least it's four hours long. (SciFi, 7 PM)

Goooooo Courtney!: The Survivor finale is tonight, and after a middling season that seems destined to crown either teeny strategical spazz Todd or Amanda the queen of the ass-blur as its champion, the only way we'd be truly impressed after the three-hour extravaganza is if Courtney the bitchy (but funny, we'll totally admit) waitress backed into a victory. Come on -- Courtney triumphing in the season of "James is the strongest Survivor of all time"? Oh, how we would laugh! (CBS, 8 PM)

Don't Blame Us If You End Up Watching It: We gave up on Nip/Tuck after last season, but after stumbling upon it last week in a channel-flipping excursion, we found a fake reality show conceit, Julia in a lesbian relationship, and a guest-starring Leslie Grossman. Can't promise that Leslie's going to stick around, but we do hear that Matt and Kimber are on drugs. Sounds as sunny as always! (FX, 10 PM)