Continue Not Watching This Show: By the time you read this, it'll have already begun, which means you all will have gotten a head start on ignoring the Temptation Island marathon on the Fox Reality Channel. (FOX Reality,  11 AM)

Your Sunday Afternoon OCD Break: It's recently come to my attention that Monk is still on the air. Huh. There's a marathon all day today. (USA 11 AM)

Don't Stop, Get It, Get It: Pie-faced ingenue Julia Stiles's career crested with Save The Last Dance, a guilty pleasure for many people who are not me. Now she has to sit back and wait to do another Jason Bourne movie every other year. She could have it worse. (TBS 12 PM)

The Curious Case Of TNT Programming: In honor of David Fincher's in-production movie about a man who ages in reverse, check out this afternoon's TNT schedule, which offers a reverse momentum of good movies (The Silence Of The Lambs, 12: 30 PM; Fincher's own Seven at 3 PM) giving way to terrible ones (Van Helsing, 5:30 PM; Con AIr 8 PM).

Still Politically Incorrect, That Rebel: Sure, he has weird hangups about women, masculinity, and children, but thank God Real Time With Bill Maher is back to help navigate the bullshit of the election season. We need all the help we can get. Friday night's episode re-airs today. (HBO 1 PM)

Soap Stars Of Yesteryear...Today: Yesterday, SoapNet was all over Rebecca Budig returning to All My Children; today, they're celebrating the return of two other characters to Pine Valley with AMC: Jesse and Angie Are Back. All I know about those two is that Debbi Morgan plays Angie, and she was awesome in a movie called Eve's Bayou. That's all I got. (SoapNet, 2 PM)

This...Is Called Hitching A Cart To A Horse: TV Guide Channel ain't no dummy, as they've become All-Idol TV this week. This afternoon, it's 25 Things You Didn't Know About Idol. If only I thought there were 25 things I didn't know about Idol. (TVGuide 3 PM)

Listen To Your Friend Billy Zane: Zoolander's on. Watch it. Again. (Comedy Central 4 PM)

THIS! IS! ACADEMIA!: If you were interested in the story of the Battle of Thermopylae but didn't want to deal with the violence, stylization, or weird mixture of homoeroticism and homophobia that was last spring's 300, you might check out Last Stand Of The 300 on The History Channel. Also, you're probably my Dad. (HIST 5 PM)

And Just In Case The Notion of "Prime Time" Means Anything To You: The Amazing Race (CBS 8 PM) will probably eliminate its fourth place team, and I'm really hoping it's Ron and Christina. The Sarah Connor Chronicles premieres on FOX at 8 PM or perhaps a little after that due to football. The tattered remains of the Golden Globes are on NBC 9 PM -- maybe they'll throw me a bone and have a drunk Shirley MacLaine announce the winners. And Brothers & Sisters (ABC 10 PM) returns with another Walker dinner party that devolves into secret-spilling and hurt feelings. Once again, a drunk Shirley MacLaine wouldn't exactly be unwelcome.