(Suggestions for Going Through Channels? Want to see more country music or more that's on at three in the morning? Know of an upcoming rerun nobody should miss? Kick it over to me at missalli at televisionwithoutpity dot com.)

"Big Cat": I've said it in this space before, and I'm going to say it again: I love While You Were Sleeping. Love it, love it, love it. Will not be dissuaded. (Starz, 9:50 AM)

A Heart To Heart: Roseanne got kind of weird and depressing in its last couple of seasons, and if you know the finale, you know that the episodes covering Dan's heart attack at Darlene's wedding take on particular significance. I was never a fan of the way they closed this show at all, but it pretty reliably has laughs in every episode, and I continue to think it's one of the strongest ensembles in terms of the average ability to deliver a joke that prime time has ever had. (Oxygen, 11 AM/11:30 AM)

Her Dad's The President: Okay, remember Chasing Liberty with Mandy Moore, and remember how First Daughter came out with Katie Holmes at practically the same time? This is neither of those. This is First Daughter with Monica Keena, which isn't a sweet romance about her falling in love with her bodyguard. Instead, it's a tense thriller where Mariel Hemingway and Gay Doug from Melrose Place are sworn to protect her and she gets kidnapped while camping. Oh, yeah, baby. It's for real. (Lifetime Movie Network, 12:40 PM)

Boogedy-Boogedy: Today on 30-Minute Meals, Rachael Ray makes chicken and butternut couscous. Or, as she calls it, "wicky-wicky and nummy-num kooky." (Food Network, 2:30 PM)

Bunk Alert: Wendell Pierce is in the listed cast of one of today's Law & Order episodes, in which Frances Conroy also appears in a story about how a religious ritual and a death may be connected. (TNT, 3 PM)

Do Not Watch This: Tonight, TLC tells the story of a woman claimed in the title to be Pregnant For 46 Years. Here's the description: "A 75-year-old woman is diagnosed with an unborn, calcified baby that had grown to full term. The pregnancy had begun in 1955." Every now and then, I'm like, "Okay, I quit television." (TLC, 7 PM)

Stereotypes Have Two Mommies: On a new Wife Swap, burlesque dancing mom swaps with lumberjack mom! Do you get it? Mom who's kind of girly swaps with mom who's kind of...you know. This show is so bad, you guys. (ABC, 8 PM)

Sad Stories: The Tom Capano murder case took place in my hometown, very much among people I tangentially was aware of, and the Ann Rule book about it, And Never Let Her Go, is really quite good. The TV movie is slightly less good (as is often the case), and stars Mark Harmon as a creep again, but it's a very absorbing and sad case where you couldn't possibly make up some of the dramatic stuff that actually happened, so I always catch the movie when I see it go by. (Lifetime Movie Network, 8 PM)

And No Samantha Harris!: If you like Dancing With The Stars, you might enjoy America's Ballroom Challenge, PBS's dance series starring actual dancers. Tonight is American Smooth night, including the foxtrot, waltz, Viennese waltz, and tango. None of which, I bet, will be set to Star Wars music. (PBS, 8 PM, or check listings)

All You Freaks, Get Ready: American Idol hits Miami, and that's a collision of potential ridiculousness that you would be wise not to miss. (Fox, 8 PM)

Frisco, NO!: I don't know one person who's been watching Crowned: The Mother Of All Pageants, so I don't know anyone who will care that the finale is tonight. However, I feel obligated to sadly acknowledge that the final pageant is being hosted by Jack Wagner. Doesn't dating Heather Locklear automatically make you too good for this gig? Dude. I'm saying: DUDE. (CW, 8 PM)

So Wait...What Happened To The Polar Bear?: Lost repeats its two-hour season finale from...back in the day, basically, in preparation for the new, presumably shortened season. (ABC, 9 PM)

Chung Chung!: A new Law & Order: Mothership investigates a triple murder. Yuck. (NBC, 10 PM)