OH MAH GOD, it's time for Dancing With The Stars to start again. It's a little bit wrong how happy that makes me, in an entirely shallow, very embarrassing sort of way. Kristi Yamaguchi! Marlee Matlin! Tom Bergeron! (ABC, 8 PM)

Courtesy of GTC reader Erin, I learned that Top Gear, which I freely admit I've never seen, is showing a fairly notorious episode this evening, involving a drive through a part of Africa. I'm tempted to try it out on the apparent strength of the TWoP usership's recommendation, and if you want to as well, it's on tonight. (BBC America, 8 PM)

There are few movies on earth I love more than Witness. It's romantic in that what-could-have-been way, it's exciting, it's funny, and it's Harrison Ford at the absolute peak of his hotness. Okay, secondary peak -- the absolute peak was Working Girl, I admit. Anyway -- see Witness tonight. (AMC, 8 PM)

It's been a long time since there was good news on the fresh-scripted-television front that involved our regularly beloved comedies, but the CBS lineup returns tonight, including How I Met Your Mother. I forgive them about Britney, and I forgive them about everything, because I have missed NPH so bad, you guys. (CBS, 8:30 PM)

As if I'm not embarrassed enough that I'll definitely watch Dancing With The Stars, I'll also probably watch The Bachelor: London Calling. I apologize to Elizabeth Cady Stanton. (ABC, 9 PM)

I must be aging, because I'm becoming one of those people who looks at a new reality show like America's Prom Queen and just thinks..."I'm so tired." (ABC Family, 9 PM)