All day Mork & Mindy (Sci Fi, 8 AM) marathon on Sci Fi. Try and figure out what kind of crack my parents were on when they cruelly named me. (Assault me with "Na-Nu Na-Nu" in the comments and you're no better than... every single person I've ever met in my entire life. Just please don't do it, OK?)

There are two reruns of Ghost Whisperer (CBS, 8 PM) on tonight -- in a row! I don't blame you if you watch them, actually; your other options are pretty shitty.

ABC's got The Polar Express (ABC, 8 PM). Let's all brace ourselves now for the 24/7 onslaught of Christmas this country (USA! USA!) insists on doing every year once Thanksgiving concludes. Seriously -- I like Christmas and all, but I don't need to be reminded every single second of every single day that it's coming for an entire month. I already know about it because of my Dilbert calendar.

Whale Wars: We Are Hooligans (Animal Planet, 9 PM) is happening tonight. Animal Planet is really good at naming things. Unlike my parents.

Dude! MTV's showing Rudy (MTV, 10 PM)! I bet if they abandoned all music content and just became a permanent Rudy marathon destination, people would stop bitching about how they don't play videos anymore. Because Rudy > T-Pain.

Iron your mankini -- there's a new installment of The Soup (E!, 10 PM)!