Tori Spelling stops by with some sort of a secret or something. In the trailers, she and Kelly (Jennie Garth) appear to be having a big heart to heart. The whole idea makes me sort of nostalgic for the classic series and really, really depressed. I feel old, and in some ways would rather have this show try and exist as its own entity than just bringing back old-schoolers. Though maybe that's the only way they can get people to tune in, which says a lot about the quality of teen acting on this show. Just saying.

Tori is now some sort of designer, which vaguely rings some bells. Like, maybe she started a store in the 15th season of the original show after I stopped watching regularly? She's tasked with creating a red-carpet gown for 90210 uber-fan Diablo Cody. Fabulous. That's two people I can't get enough of together at last. I'm really looking forward to it... actually, I'd much rather figure out where Jessica Walter's drunken grandma character went and see what she's doing instead, but that's not what we're getting. Oh, and I'm no fashionista, but what designer would be caught dead in the green shirt Tori is wearing in this picture?

Elsewhere on this show that is ostensibly about high school teenagers and not their teacher's random friends, Dixon also goes secretly searching for his birth mother, since watching his girlfriend go bananas last week made him want to reconnect with his equally nutbar mother. And I'm sure Annie and Ethan stare at each other angstfully a lot.

If you dare, watch this on The CW at 9 PM. If not, find some other options in our Week in Preview.