From the mind of Jerry Seinfeld, the man who came up with the idea for Bee Movie -- a movie spawned entirely by a bad pun, like Black Knight -- comes The Marriage Ref, In which celebrities help bickering couples resolve their differences! Because celebrities are very good at that! Actually, we believe that that's part of the joke, that these celebrities are as far from relationship experts as you can get -- and part of us wants to give Seinfeld kudos for that if it's true -- but it's entirely possible that he just thinks that the mundane problems of couples (you know, trimming nails in bed, a man who excessively tans and manicures, etc.) are ripe for comedic exploitation by wealthy entertainers, and that people will want to watch that.

February 27, 2010

What I Hate About Me (Style, 9 PM) is hopping on one of reality TV's favorite trends tonight, with this not-so-subtle-but-who-really-cares episode titled, "Desperate Housewife."

Jennifer Lopez is hosting this week's episode of Saturday Night Live (NBC, 11:29 PM). However, now that she split with Sony, and The Back-Up Plan got pushed back a month, what will she be promoting?

February 28, 2010

I understand the shock and pain of Your Kid Ate What?: Parents' Worst Nightmare (TLC, 9 PM) because one time my dog ate a bouncy ball and he had to get his stomach pumped. Poor Angus!

NBC has done one hell of a job promoting The Marriage Ref (NBC, 10:30 PM). Tonight's the night we finally get to watch (and officially get to hate) the show.

March 1, 2010

The finale of The Bachelor (ABC, 8 PM) is tonight. I know Disney princess Tenley is the lesser of two evils, but go #neitherofthem!

Carrie Underwood guest stars (and makes her acting debut) on this evening's How I Met Your Mother (CBS, 8 PM). Here's a sneak peek for y'all.

The Real Housewives Top 25: The Early Years (Bravo, 10 PM) will feature 25 of the best moments from the first seasons of New York, Atlanta and New Jersey and the first two seasons of Orange County, as selected by Andy Cohen. How could he have possibly decided what made the cut? My top 25 would probably be like, 99% ridiculous things the Countess said last season.

March 2, 2010

Oh my goodness, The Biggest Loser (NBC, 8 PM) finally comes back tonight! Who will lose the elimination challenge: Darrell or Cheryl? Who will be the least tolerable this week, now that Melissa is gone? So many questions will be answered!

Here's hoping the series premiere of Parenthood (NBC, 10 PM) isn't disappointing. Between this and Chuck, I might start liking NBC shows again.

Catch the second season premiere of Southland (TNT, 10 PM), because this may be the show's final season if its ratings don't pick up.

March 3, 2010

Whoa, tonight is the series finale of Nip/Tuck (FX, 10 PM)? Where have I been? Ohh, that's right -- not watching Nip/Tuck since The Carver storyline ended and they all moved out of Miami.

Because I love Beverly D'Angelo, I'm assuming Cougar Town (ABC, 9:30 PM) will be especially funny this week.

March 4, 2010

Jim and Pam have their baby on tonight's one-hour episode of The Office (NBC, 9 PM). One hundred Schrute Bucks says Michael finds a way to sneak into the delivery room.

Watch the season finale of Burn Notice (USA, 10 PM) tonight to find out the identity of the prisoner that Michael Weston helped escape. Anyone have a prediction?

I'm tempted to watch the third season finale of Celebrity Rehab with Dr. Drew (VH1, 10 PM) tonight, but only to feed my hatred of Pinsky.

Would you describe you excitement for the third season premiere of The Real Housewives of New York City (Bravo, 10 PM) as "extreme" or "off-the-charts tremendous"? Either way, prepare yourself by going for a quick jog in the middle of traffic in Manhattan.

March 5, 2010

Who Do You Think You Are? (NBC, 8 PM) premieres tonight. In this episode, we learn about Sarah Jessica Parker's ancestry. I realize that sounds boring written out, but I don't think it'll be as boring on TV with background music and cool editing tricks.

The Soup (E!, 10 PM) presents The Soup Awards tonight. Get ready for a solid 15 minutes of Wendy Williams!

As I tried to establish last week, The Life & Times of Tim is a solid, entertaining comedy, even to those of us who aren't stoners. This week's episode, "The Comeback Sermon"/"Atlantic City," sounds promising.

Tonight, ABC airs the unintended series finale of the short-lived lawyer show The Deep End. While it wasn't the best or most groundbreaking concept on television, it had some decent actors I like (adorable Broadway boy Norbert Leo Butz, Veronica Mars' Tina Majorino, scary Billy Zane, that guy who played Eggs on True Blood) and kept them gainfully employed for a brief period of time. So if for nothing else, it deserves some sort of credit.

I had long been looking for a new show about the awkwardness of teenage years to balance out Gossip Girl's privileged teens and fill the void in my heart left by Freaks and Geeks, and I pretty much found it with the quirky BBC America show The In-Betweeners. I treated myself to a marathon of episodes recently and was alternately giggling and cringing. Much like my entire high school existence.

Ordinarily I'd gripe about a reality show that pauses before its finale for a reunion special, but these "Women Tell All" episodes usually end up being the best of the entire season. I mean, it's The Bachelor we're talking about; the bar is pretty low. Anyway, tonight! Rozlyn (the one who got kicked off the show for allegedly hooking up with a producer) will be confronted by all the other ladies for being such a tramp that she never even slept in her own bed, had the nerve to cuddle with this staffer right in front of them, and the gamechanger -- Ella's assertion that she quote "Had [her] butt up in the air" at some point. My pearls are clutched!

February 20, 2010

The best bet for your early Saturday night movie on TV is probably Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban (ABC, 8 PM). Enjoy it now, because I swear, the only HP movie ever on TV is Chamber of Secrets.

Okay, so the episode of Numbers (CBS, 8 PM) that's on tonight is a repeat, but it is a truly solid episode. Come on: murders that are copied from scenes out of a soon-to-be-released movie? So sick!

February 21, 2010

Though my standards are pretty low for this season of The Simpsons (Fox, 8 PM), I think the past few episodes (especially "Million Dollar Maybe") have been pretty good. Hopefully tonight's "The Color Yellow" won't prove me wrong.

After a three-week-long hiatus, Desperate Housewives (ABC, 9 PM) is finally back to reveal more information about its stupid mysteries. And, hey, maybe John Barrowman will finally show up.

Tonight's the fourth season finale of Keeping Up with the Kardashians (E!, 10 PM). In this episode, baby Mason is delivered and Kim will probably threaten national security again.

February 22, 2010

We are (literally) in the midnight hour on tonight's episode of 24 (FOX, 9 PM). Because the show won't be around forever, savor this season.

That list of things to do on The Buried Life (MTV, 10 PM) has sounded pretty boring all season, but on tonight's episode, the guys play basketball with Barack Obama! Fun!

February 23, 2010

For the past few weeks, Lost (ABC, 9 PM) has been cooking up something good. Based on the promos and all 50 of the fan blogs I read, tonight's episode is going to be full of answers, old characters we haven't seen in a while, and general greatness.

I've been told that this season of Bad Girls Club (Oxygen, 10 PM) has been ridiculously good. After reading through the BGC TWoP forum, I may have to start watching.

February 24, 2010

The very funny Inbetweeners (BBC America, 9:30 PM) returns tonight for its second season debut. Check it out, unless you're some kind of bumder.

I think tonight is the episode of The Real World (MTV, 10 PM) where that annoying guy gets really hurt when he falls on the pavement. I can't wait!

February 25, 2010

It's finally that time of year when American Idol (Fox, 8PM) is on three times a week. Can you guys believe there are weeks when Idol isn't on that often? What a sad world!

The first season finale of The Deep End (ABC, 8 PM) is tonight. We're not so sure there will be much more episodes after this one, so here's hoping Addy and Malcom somehow end up together ASAP.

The Real Housewives of Orange County (Bravo, 10 PM) bitch their way through tonight's finale episode. I'm a little bummed to see this season come to an end, but at least this means we're that much closer to the NYC housewives. I'm all about the silver lining when it comes to these ridiculous Bravo shows.

February 26, 2010

Live From Abbey Road (Sundance, 8 PM) has a Beatles-centric episode tonight... but don't worry, there's still going to be an entire season worth of indie bands from here on out.

This is the last weeknight that the Olympic Winter Games (NBC, 8 PM) will be on. Sad to see them go, but that means all of our NBC shows are on again starting Monday! Thank God, because I have been going through very serious Biggest Loser withdrawal. I've nearly stopped buying Ziploc bags.

I love the simplicity of this. It's just animated versions of Ricky Gervais's colossally popular podcast with his buddies Stephen Merchant and Karl Pilkington. That's all it is. Really! And that's just dandy. Those podcasts are very funny and enjoyable, and so are cartoons, particularly cartoon versions of these guys, as it turns out.

Obviously, since I've been obsessed with Sundance Channel's Be Good Johnny Weir, I'm going to spend most of my evening watching the Men's Figure Skating Finals to see if adorable little Johnny can pull out a medal, but I'm almost equally as excited for the season premiere of LA Ink. Yes, it's a show about tattoos and the drama seems forced and staged, but I just can't help myself. It's like an edgier, older version of The Hills.

It's the season finale of Leverage, y'all! If you've been watching this season, you've gotten to spend some time with your old friend Jeri Ryan, as Gina Bellman has been on a leave of absence, so get ready to maybe say good-bye to her, unless they decide to keep her around for another season. This episode is called "The Maltese Falcon Job," and supposedly features the crew's greatest con yet, which... is really saying something, because some of them are so complicated and contingent on a specific series of events they verge on far-fetched. But I guess it would have to be pretty good to earn the name "The Maltese Falcon Job." Otherwise, it would probably be named after one of Bogie's lesser works. ("The In a Lonely Place Job"?)