March 13, 2010

Without a doubt, the best thing to watch tonight is Roger Corman's Dinoshark (Syfy, 9 PM). In case you can't tell by the title, the movie is about a vicious prehistoric (and delightfully CGI) monster that eats people. If it's half as good as Dinocroc, I'll be pleased as punch.

Not to be outdone, Who is Clark Rockefeller? (Lifetime, 9 PM) premieres tonight as well. Tuesday's episode of Lost is supposed to be Sawyer-centric, so watching this will get you in the con man spirit.

March 14, 2010

Guy Fieri on network television? Really? Let's count down the seconds until Minute to Win It (NBC, 7 PM) inevitably gets canceled, because this show makes The Marriage Ref look interesting.

It's finally time for the third season of The Celebrity Apprentice (NBC, 9 PM)! We've got our fair share of predictions for this cycle, and have learned that both Bret Michaels and Donald Trump are afraid of Sharon Osbourne.

Band of Brothers' miniseries cousin The Pacific (HBO, 9 PM) epically begins tonight. Watch it, love it, be all snotty about it at your Emmy party when no one's watched it but you.

And hey, Sons of Tucson (Fox, 9:30 PM) premieres tonight. It's goofy.

The latest show about horrible rich people is Pretty Wild (E!, 10:30 PM). You may be familiar with one of the girls on the show, as she was allegedly part of the "Bling Ring," that group of Hollywood teens who broke into a bunch of celebrities' homes last year and stole millions of dollars worth of their stuff. Adorable.

March 15, 2010

Believe it or not, I'm pretty sure that tonight's 20/20: Inside The Bachelor: The Stories Behind the Rose (ABC, 8:00 PM) is going to be the last televised special dedicated to The Bachelor franchise for a while. Lucky us!

It feels strange to say, but Jessica Simpson's new series The Price of Beauty (VH1, 10 PM) sounds interesting and unique. Cameras follow as she travels to different parts of the world to examine how other cultures perceive, attain and maintain beauty. Unless Simpson goes all Tyra on our asses, this could be great.

Following Beauty is another new series, TRANSform Me (VH1, 10:30). The name is annoying, but I'm again pleasantly surprised to learn about the show: In each episode, a woman in need gets both outside and inside makeovers by three ultra-glamorous transgendered women. VH1 definitely has potential to screw this up and make it way too over-the-top, but I'm willing to give it a chance.

March 16, 2010

We're finally at the point in American Idol (Fox, 8 PM) when the finalists are down to a manageable number of 12. This two-hour episode marks the point where I attempt to start watching.

Tonight is the first half of The Bad Girls Club (Oxygen, 10 PM) reunion, arguably the best reality event on television. Seriously, Perez Hilton is the host and these girls go freaking crazy. Even if you haven't watched BGC this season, this gathering is worth checking out.

If you've never seen FlashForward (ABC, 10 PM) and are interested in a quick recap of what's happened in the series so far, tonight's "What Did You See?" episode will bring you up-to-date. At the end of the hour, I'm sure you'll be as disappointed with the show as we are.

March 17, 2010

The ninth season finale of Scrubs (ABC, 8 PM) is tonight. According to creator Bill Lawrence, this may very well be the series finale, unless it miraculously gets picked up for a Season 10. As much as I'd like to say good riddance, part of me thinks this show will never, ever die. Lord knows ABC has made worse mistakes.

The super-boring 23rd season of The Real World (MTV, 10 PM) finishes up tonight. I'm excited that I'll potentially never have to see Ty Ruff ever again.