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Monday, August 9, 2010: Bachelor Pad

by Mindy Monez August 9, 2010 6:00 am
Monday, August 9, 2010: <I>Bachelor Pad</I>

I'm very excited for Bachelor Pad, but I'm also not quite clear on what it is. It's a Big Brother-style competition for money -- that I get -- but it's also apparently a dating show, too? I watched the first thirty minutes of the premiere and I am completely confused. The contestants compete against each other in physical challenges, but then, if you win a challenge you get a rose, which allows you to go on a date with the contestant of your choice, whom you can then vote to evict? I have no idea, but they kept saying things like "I'm ready to open my heart up and win $250,000" and other things that just sounded like something someone in a bad parody sketch would say, which I guess is what this is, really, so I'll go with it.

So most of the villains are back (Wes, Craig M, David, Michelle) and everyone's just going to bang and backstab each other until someone wins $250,000 and it's just so great. And no need to worry about them needing time to warm up to each other -- they all go way back, as participating in The Bachelor-verse is not unlike cults and organized crime: once you're in, you're never getting out, lest Chris Harrison set fire to your family. Nice to see you're back for more humiliation, Michelle! And everybody else, actually!

Bachelor Pad premieres on ABC tonight at 8 PM (two-hour premiere), opposite the Teen Choice Awards, Huge, Intervention and The Closer.

Check out five reasons why Chris should be the next Bachelor.

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