What better way to celebrate the anniversary of the end of prohibition than to watch the season finale of this show about prohibition? Seems totally fitting. And drinking while watching it seems like it can only make it more fun, since this show isn't exactly as consistently riveting as I'd hoped.

On Smallville, Kryptonite is always making people act funny, magic spells are always shaking up the status quo and time travel is always showing us horrible futures. But this may be the first time the show has shown us an honest-to-God alternate reality. (Forgive me if I've forgotten a prior instance. This show's been on for so, so, so long.) It happens in comics all the time -- "What If...?" and "Elseworlds" stories used to be a dime a dozen, and there are currently 52 different versions of Earth happening in the DC universe all at once. But tonight, Clark Kent uses a Kryptonian device to travel to a world where his last name... is Luthor!

It's the finale of The Apprentice, and yeah, I know, no one is watching it, which is probably the only reason that Trump decided to throw Mindy and me (the sole viewers of this show) a bone and have the final two tasks be awesome. After someone (probably Liza) gets the boot, the other two contestants (probably Clint and Brandy) will each have an event to plan... as per usual. The events? One has to plan a golf tournament featuring Kathy Griffin and the other has to plan a Liza Minnelli concert. It's the most awesomely, wonderfully gay-friendly thing I've seen on this show since David was fawning over that male model.

Only two bitches are left standing and tonight one of them will earn the most fabulous prize in Top Model history, or at least that's Tyra has led me to believe. The winner (my money is on Ann) will get to be in Italian Vogue and the other will be swallowed up whole by Andre Leon Talley's cloak.