Premiering on Bravo tonight, Million Dollar Decorators -- not to be confused with Million Dollar Listing, which is about realtors -- follows five LA-based decorators who furnish the homes of the rich and famous. And shocker: it's a glamorous and cutthroat world. Is it ever not on a reality TV Show?

You didn't think Bravo was going to ignore the ever-growing singing competition show craze, did you? Good, because they didn't. But there's a twist! Platinum Hit, which premieres tonight, is a singer-songwriter competition. Brains will be used! On a reality show!

TLC continues to demonstrate that people you didn't actually believe existed do (e.g. a woman addicted to eating couch cushions and women who don't know they're pregnant) with tonight's premiere of My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding. Remember when you dressed up as Esmeralda one Halloween and that was the extent of your gypsy knowledge? Not anymooore!

It's the series finale for this poor, canceled, terrible show. It started with a nifty plane disappearance, and it ends with one of the dumbest alien invasion plots ever aired on television finally limping to fruition. Or maybe not! Sophia's pretty incompetent, so maybe it won't happen. Luckily for her, the humans she's trying to exterminate are even dumber than she is.

Well, Trump told the world that he wasn't going to run for president, so we now know that this franchise can continue to live on and rot our brains until NBC sees fit to cancel it. What we don't know is who is going to win the stupid meaningless title that only matters once a season when the former winners are trotted out to grill the new kids.

It's guest-star-apalooza on The Office finale tonight, featuring such famous talents as: Jim Carrey! Ray Romano! Donna Noble! James Spader! Will Arnett! And Ricky Gervais! Ordinarily I'd ask for some cheese with my whine where stuntcasting is concerned, but the show could use a fun little departure episode like this, especially with visits from those admittedly very funny people. (Yes, even Ray Romano. Men of a Certain Age has redeemed him for me. Don't judge me.)

There's not one, but two -- TWO! -- episodes of this average couple sitcom on tonight. Fantastic, because that's an entire hour that I can largely ignore. But some people must be watching it, since this show is coming back next season. Way to be the most tolerable show about a group of coupled up friends that debuted this year. Aim high!

Tonight marks the end of The Good Wife's wonderful second season (really, despite its missteps, this is still one of the best shows on TV), and the episode's synopsis and previews promise two highly titillating things: 1) Alicia and Kalinda having to work together to exonerate their client of murder, and 2) Alicia and Will smooching it up in an elevator. Oh. My word.

It's the How I Met Your Mother season finale, and it's taking place at the long-teased mysterious wedding attended by The Mother! Surely, Ted will meet her tonight and ask her out and we can all stop complaining about how long this is taking, right? Because believe it or not, I'd love to stop bitching about it. Really. Just give me the chance. Please.

The least-anticipated season finale of Desperate Housewives ever is here at last. This season has taught us that bringing back old beloved characters from earlier seasons doesn't always bring the best out of a show. It was a great surprise to see the return of Paul Young, an old enemy to Wysteria Lane, but did they do anything clever with it? They repeatedly recycled plot lines we've seen before: Paul Young's wife shoots herself, Felicia is stirring up trouble in Paul's life, Susan Mayer is a victim (this time with a kidney problems), Gaby ticks off Carlos, and Lynette can't keep her man happy. Can this show's season finale save what might be its weakest season?