It's that time again! As this season of The Bachelorette comes to a close, all of the eliminated men get together with Chris Harrison, Ashley (!) and a live audience to say their piece. Basically, it's Return of the Assholes.

After the awfulness that was Season Eight, things can only get better from here, right? Well, the fact that we start thing off with 20 designers doesn't exactly make me optimistic... they're going to be down to 16 by the end of the night, but that's still so. many. competitors. And Lifetime is sticking to the 90-minute format, which is just plain cruel if the challenges continue to suck.

While we've seen enough blurred shots of Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi's crotch on Jersey Shore to last a lifetime, what she hasn't completely over-shared is her journey to becoming the Bumpit Queen she is today.

After seven seasons, it's really great that Deadliest Catch has stuck to its roots and remained a show dedicated to showing the incredibly difficult and dangerous occupation of crab fishing. It would have really sucked if the series had deteriorated into snippets of bickering and childish drama... oops, never mind.

HBO's annual documentary film series always yields some compelling true-life tales, and the eighth entry in this year's edition is no exception. Directed by Liz Garbus, There's Something Wrong With Aunt Diane chronicles a story that made national headlines in 2009. While driving home from a camping trip with five children in her car, Long Island resident Diane Schuler somehow wound up driving down the wrong side of the Taconic State Parkway -- a lengthy stretch of road that winds through upstate New York -- and eventually collided head-on with an SUV, killing everyone save for her 5-year-old son. In the immediate aftermath of the incident, many speculated that Schuler was potentially under the influence of alcohol or experienced some kind of a mental breakdown, both claims that her surviving family vigorously denied.

After a long and bumpy run, the eighth and final season of HBO's dude-man-dudiest show is finally here.

Fact: I will watch any show affiliated with Say Yes to the Dress. Especially ones where women expect/demand their 15 closest BFFs to each pay over $500 for a bridesmaid dress. While I'm never a fan of seeing a grown woman cry because she feels ashamed and embarrassed that she can't afford something, that part is mercifully only a small percentage of the show. Most of the time, I'm happy to report, it's vaguely dramatic little bumps in the road of the stereotypical American wedding bullshit combined with boring or otherwise ugly dresses. It's a pleasant and mindless formula that completely works for me.

It's been a short and sweet season of the only show MTV knows how to not completely whore out. We've seen sugar babies, allergies, "straight" people (that one was actually really sad) and so much more in these few weeks. We wrap up tonight with I'm in the Marijuana Business, which frankly sounds like the least compelling episode of the summer - but on the bright side, it'll still probably have a better storyline than anything you'll see on Weeds in the near future.

Everyone has their own backstory on how they got into Storage Wars. Perhaps you once stayed up into the wee hours of the night, saw there was a five-hour marathon on and liked the idea of learning about a unique subculture. Maybe you're one of twenty (if cisyboo is correct) people who bought one of Dave's "rare" Elvis newspapers on eBay. Maybe you're just interested in antiquing or something. In any event, Season 2 of this pleasantly addictive and often nonsensical (how do you look at a box of baseball cards and just *know* it's worth thousands of dollars?!) series is here.

It's another summer game show! If you've seen the inescapable promos, then you know -- if you haven't, here's what's up. It's Worth What? is basically The Price is Right, but with way more expensive and exotic items and hosted by Cedric the Entertainer instead of Drew Carey. A pair of contestants is given two items and they have to guess which one is more expensive. Example? The biggest diamond ring you've ever seen versus an actual living elephant. If they get it right, they advance to the next level, where the items are harder to make guesses about and/or they have to order multiple items from least to most expensive, and so on. As they get further into the game, the challenges get more and more difficult. The contestants can win up to $1 million if they guess correctly.