In just one thrilling hour, we're supposed to learn about how Snooki got involved in the fist-pumping lifestyle, how she dealt with "mean girls" in high school, and what went down during her MTV audition. I also predict we'll learn a thing or two about pickles, extreme tanning, and what is it that drives a person to find "Guido Gorilla Juiceheads" just so damn irresistible.

E! True Hollywood Story: Snooki premieres tonight at 10:00 PM on E!.

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