It's surprising that a movie based on this old standby hasn't already been made. It could be a sort of Dickensian tale of money, class, and power. Bruce Willis would star as a Scrooge-ish player who berates his employees, making them work through Christmas while he wheels and deals his way through another Park Avenue takeover. Eventually, he finds himself trapped in a jail where he meets a wise old prisoner who was once a Monopoly player himself. Having learned the error of his ways, he now passes on his wisdom to Bruce, who beatifically donates all his property to the poor while a Josh Groban Christmas song makes everyone in the audience feel alternately warm and nauseated. Rated: PG

In an amusing display of self-awareness, Brad and Angelina would star in a surreal comedy based on a board game where you collect children like some people collect stamps. [Ed's note: Michel Gondry would be the perf director for this. Pure meta goodness! -- Lauren] Rated: PG-13

That ballerina hippo from Disney's Fantasia could be trotted out for a new audience. The aforementioned beast mounts a career as a professional dancer. As she becomes more and more famous, the pressures to lose weight begin to build. What starts out as light-hearted children's fare takes on a more serious tone as our heroine competes with the other hippo ballerinas to see who can go the longest without food. In a hunger-crazed rampage, she eventually devours everything in her path, including hamburgers, French fries, foot-long chili dogs, and a stunned Rachel Zoe. Everyone cheers. Rated: PG

This one would be a natural for the people who brought you the Saw movies. A failed art student abducts and holds victims in a house of horrors, commanding them each to draw pictures or face a gruesome ending. Every exit is booby-trapped. The accumulating fumes from the permanent markers make it harder and harder for the players to concentrate. Paper cuts are rampant! Tempers flare as one unlucky man keeps drawing a sheep that looks more like a VW Bug! All the while, they hear the film's catchphrase repeated over and over: Draw. Or die! Rated: R

The sad thing is, none of these really sound any less likely than a Ouija board movie.