But it's really true. New York City Opera has commissioned composer Charles Wuorinen to compose it for the 2013 season. Wuorinen, who turns 70 today, said in a press release that he's wanted to make this into an opera ever since he first read the story. [Fun Fact: In Hollywood, cowboy movies used to be called "horse operas." In fact, some film critics still use the phrase today, to make themselves feel better about reviewing cowboy movies for a living! - Zach]

A few questions this terrible idea raises:

- Will the now-infamous "I wish I could quit you" line be sung, or simply spoken?

- Will any of the stars of the movie make a cameo in the opera? (I'm looking at you, Randy Quaid. Because nothing screams future opera star like starring in Kingpin.)

- What if the opera doesn't win the Oscar of operas? Will everyone (including Proulx again) cry foul if Crash, the opera, tops it? (Fortunately, yes, I am kidding: There isn't yet an operatic version of Crash that I know of. There will, however, be a TV version. Consider yourself warned).

- Is everyone at the New York City Opera temporarily insane? Because if there has ever been a story that doesn't scream "opera!" -- and that, in fact, screams "please, never an opera!" -- it's this one. I'm pretty sure that Jack and Ennis would never have anything to do with the opera. They're just simple Wyoming roughnecks after all.