Meet Dave is directed by Brian Robbins, who is no stranger to heads, having once been a classmate on Head of the Class. Robbins also directed Norbit, costing Murphy the Oscar he should have received for Dreamgirls and causing me further embarrassment by using my doppelganger, Cuba Gooding Jr., in yet another stupendously awful role. The plot has an alien ship that looks like Eddie Murphy coming to Earth. The ship is piloted by a tiny Eddie Murphy, a plot device no doubt appreciated by the man who once said about G.I. Joe on Saturday Night Live, "if somebody shrunk me from 11 inches to 4 inches, I'd be pissed off too." Tiny Murphy pilots Big Murphy from the ship's head, leading us full circle to the Zardoz update currently scaring the shit out of people on the street.

What strikes me oddest about this story isn't that nobody thought of all the B.J. jokes one could get out of this development. What gets me is that somebody greenlit an Eddie Murphy science fiction movie after he made The Adventures of Pluto Nash. One should be thankful that Paul Thomas Anderson didn't use this same "giant anatomy" promotion when he made Boogie Nights, nor Fox back in the Eighties when they produced Dolly Parton's biggest movie, 9 to 5. However, if this is a success, God knows what huge star body part you'll be passing next on the street.