Okay, I'll admit it. Cobra Commander was a little ridiculous in the G.I. Joe cartoon. His scratchy voice was menacing at first, but whenever he started cursing out the "bumbling morons" who worked for him, it quickly veered into the comical. But the man had a stylin' military look, whether he was rocking a blue hood or a shiny helmet, and if there was one costume I was looking forward to seeing in the live-action G.I. Joe film, it was that one. Unfortunately, I should have known better after seeing the Joe team's battle outfits from the movie, none of which -- with the sole exception of Snake Eyes -- look anything like their famous, individually distinctive uniforms. The movie Cobra Commander may not be very recognizable, because apparently -- and this is according to one of the movie's producers -- Cobra Commander's hood is racist.

Two months ago, some diehard fans of the original Ghostbusters movies had mixed emotions -- relief that a third installment with younger replacement characters turned out to be just a rumor, but sadness that it looked like there'd be nothing strange in the neighborhood any time soon. Well, much like a slimy green ghost with an insatiable appetite, you can't keep nostalgia or a good money-maker down for long. Variety reports that "Columbia Pictures is getting serious about scaring up a new installment of its blockbuster Ghostbuster franchise."

Yes, we know it's the name of a city in Thailand. Yes, we realize that the phrase could easily refer to the hazards of being a professional hitman in that city, or perhaps that section of the city where it simply isn't safe to go walking late at night. Still, we can't help but snicker every time we hear the film title Bangkok Dangerous, because it sounds like someone is engaging in risky sexual practices with a Thai hooker. Also, we're, like, 13 years old, emotionally. Anyway, the release of the Pang Brothers' remake of their own 1999 film of the same name got us thinking about other movie titles that make us giggle like 7th-graders for their sexual innuendo. Here are the ten most titter-inducing that aren't actually pornographic films.

Being that this is a short work week, you'd think it would take more than hearing that Nicolas Cage is in talks with Marvel Studios to make a sequel to Ghost Rider to ruin my day. You'd think wrong. The trailer for the first movie was so bad that it alone soured me on Nicolas Cage, probably forever. And now they want to make another one? In a discussion with Dark Horizons, Cage said that he'd met with the studio three months ago and they discussed changing the setting completely. "The general idea was to take the character to Europe where he will work with the Catholic Church, deal with supernatural stuff on the continent and figure out a 'connection working with different religious figures.' The film's main antagonist has yet to be decided." Um, how about me?

Poor Aaron Eckhart. Just over a month ago, and only five days after The Dark Knight opened to huge numbers, he told the world he was ready to jump back in the saddle for the The Dark Knight's sequel, saying that to work with the cast again would be "phenomenal." It didn't take long for the actor to get a reminder that his character had, in fact, died at the end of the previous movie and wouldn't be making an appearance in any sequels.

I don't think anyone would call Guillermo del Toro a fly-by-the-seat-of-his-pants kind of guy. He's definitely a planner. So much of one, in fact, that his professional calendar is booked through 2017. Currently -- and for the next five years -- knee-deep in The Hobbit, del Toro signed a three-year first-look deal with Universal in June of last year that will pick up after the epic New Line/Miramax project is finished.

My Great Aunt Muriel's old excuse for holding onto her VCR -- and eschewing the purchase of such "new" technology as a DVD player -- was that there were more titles on video tape, and that there was no way she'd ever be able to replace all (eight) of the movies in her library to make the DVD player purchase worth it. If she hadn't died five years ago, I'd print out this article from the Hollywood Reporter and mail it to her with a Best Buy gift card. The number of films now available on DVD has passed 90,000. I didn't even know there were more than 90,000 films out there. Turns out by December 31st of this year, there will be 90,440 movies that you can take back to Blockbuster without having to rewind them.

Tarzan, in whatever version it finds itself, has long been on my shit list. Most put the blame squarely on the shoulders of that 2003 (I don't think it made it into 2004) WB series of the same name (which, perhaps because of the beefcake, I totally watched), but in reality, it happened the minute Disney decided to screw with the single greatest attraction, ever, the Swiss Family Robinson Tree House at their Disneyland resort, by turning it into the ultimate lameness that is the Tarzan Treehouse. The pirates learned the hard way not to fuck with the Swiss Family Robinson, and I hope someday Disney does, too. Where was I going with that? Oh yeah. A new Tarzan is in the works, folks -- this one a re-imagination of the classic, Tarzan, Lord of the Apes.

When watching movie trailers, audiences are usually so entranced by the images they're shown that few people think about the voice that's telling them what the movie's about. Of course, if the voice is doing its job right, you don't have to think about it; only a bad voice-over jars you out of the scenes you're watching. A good voice-over will make you think some omnipotent deity is inside your head, filling you in on the details, and more often than not, Don LaFontaine was that omnipotent deity. Sadly, he passed away on September 1, which means he just got a lot more omnipotent, and one step closer to deification.