BLOGS

Movie Predictions For 2009: Not As Crazy As They Sound If we look carefully at the movie trends of 2008, it's not hard to make a few predictions for the year ahead. Sure, some of these may seem kind of crazy, or maybe they sound flat-out impossible. But just remember these seven words: Steven Soderbergh to direct Cleopatra rock musical. Anything can happen, so get in on the ground floor of these predictions while you can!

After venturing to Spain in 2008 for Vicky Cristina Barcelona, Woody Allen will return to his beloved New York for a remake of 1984's Splash. Scarlett Johansson will star as the mermaid Madison. When the studio balks at Allen wanting to play the romantic leading role originally played by Tom Hanks, he drops out of the project. James Cameron takes over and films the whole thing in 3-D.

'80s TV show Airwolf will be adapted for the big screen. This time, it will be a comedy starring Jack Black as the cello-playing helicopter pilot Stringfellow Hawke. Except instead of a cello, it's a guitar, and he'll have some kind of ironic hang-up, like a fear of heights.

Ubiquitous comedy movie star Will Ferrell will take on a dramatic role. The studio, wishing to pull in Ferrell's established fan base, unwisely markets the movie with funny-looking trailers. Moviegoers respond by staying home to re-watch Old School on DVD instead.

As the economy continues its downward spiral, movie award winners will be given a choice to take home imaginary trophies or accept far cheaper alternatives. Oscar statuettes, for example, will be made of chocolate Easter bunnies from the year before. Awards party goodie bags will be replaced with $5 Subway Sandwich gift certificates.

Many sequels have become so unimaginative that studios simply take footage from the original movies and re-dub them with new dialogue. They then add in a few 3-D scenes, slap together a new trailer, and wait for the money to roll in.

What are some of your predictions for 2009?

5 Comments

December 30, 2008 12:12 PM
cliff
Reply

Anything is possible and dumber things have actually happened.

December 31, 2008 1:32 AM
Dr Pepper
Reply

Spielberg decides to remake the late 70's movie The Duelists. This time, instead of two of Napolean's officers excanging saber slashes, it will be two Pokemon players. They meet as high school seniors in the finals of a tournament that is interrupted when the roof collapses in a storm. Then the plot follows them through college as they periodically attempt to determine once and for all who is the true champion.

December 31, 2008 7:13 AM
Andy
Reply

Two words...Robo CopRock. Throw Gary Coleman in there somewhere and you have a sure-fire winner.

January 2, 2009 12:08 PM
BRWombat
Reply

Hamlet, starring Jack Black.

February 5, 2009 1:04 PM
Ann
Reply

Hotel for Frogs.

Loading...

Add a comment

BLOG ARCHIVES

The Moviefile

November 2009

17 Entries

October 2009

27 Entries

September 2009

30 Entries

August 2009

28 Entries

July 2009

34 Entries

June 2009

27 Entries

May 2009

24 Entries

April 2009

23 Entries

March 2009

18 Entries

February 2009

30 Entries

January 2009

56 Entries

December 2008

51 Entries

November 2008

61 Entries

October 2008

102 Entries

September 2008

86 Entries

August 2008

99 Entries

July 2008

116 Entries

June 2008

95 Entries

May 2008

86 Entries

April 2008

67 Entries

March 2008

14 Entries

Blog Categories

Accidents Do Happen

42 Entries

Box Office Tally

55 Entries

Coming Soonish

7 Entries

Cool Nerds Guide

2 Entries

DVDs Unwrapped

22 Entries

Foreign Relations

31 Entries

Girls on Film

47 Entries

I Voted for GORE!

78 Entries

I Want My DVD

54 Entries

It's a Major Award!

38 Entries

Legal Eaglese

18 Entries

Martial Artistry

6 Entries

Momentous Occasions

22 Entries

More On Movies

0 Entries

Musicalifornication

36 Entries

Sci-Fidelity

93 Entries

Separate but Sequel

191 Entries

Strike Watch

14 Entries

The Biz

115 Entries

The Casting Conch

165 Entries

The Kongs of Comedy

125 Entries

Top of the

0 Entries

Top of the MWoP

4 Entries

Trailer Trashing

54 Entries

We Call Do-Over

142 Entries

You Know, For Kids!

93 Entries