BLOGS
January 2009 Archives
Obviously, no one's dying to see Underworld: Rise of Lycans. I'm not saying that anyone is. I'm just saying that if maybe you've seen everything that's out already and come next Friday night you're thinking, "Hey, I don't mind spending 12 bucks to see some vampires and werewolves fight," the way I see it there are a lot of reasons to be dissuaded. Nine, to be exact.
Now that that great TV show Pushing Daisies, is, well, pushing daisies with no new episodes on the schedule and no resolution for the characters or story, what are fans of the show to do? Well, if show regular Kristin Chenoweth is right, all they might have to do is walk down to the video store and rent the movie. In an interview with TV Guide, Chenoweth claims that series runner Bryan Fuller is aiming to make a direct-to-DVD movie that would wrap up the series' various storylines.
Who's getting sick of Iron Man 2 updates? Not us! Amid the recent rumors swirling through the trades about baddie casting (and, well, casting in general) for the superhero sequel, comes talk of actress Emily Blunt in negotiations for the part of the femme fatale Black Widow. Blunt, who may be best known for her part as lead assistant-to-Miranda-Priestly Emily in The Devil Wears Prada, would play the Black Widow, also known as Natasha Romanoff, a Soviet superspy beauty who dresses in a skintight black costume that's enhanced, much like Iron Man's costume, with high-tech weaponry. Yowza!
Ricardo Montalban, an actor well known for his work on screens both large and small, passed away Wednesday at his home in Los Angeles. He was 88 years old. To me, there are three Ricardo Montalbans. There's the white-suited Mr. Rourke, who had the most righteous wish-granting powers this side of Aladdin's lamp on Fantasy Island; there's the voice from the Chrysler commercials that could get even my dedicated Ford-driving great aunt to buy a Chrysler because that rich Corinthian leather just sounded sexy, and, probably closest to my heart, there was Khan. Pectoral-tacular, Captain Kirk-infuriating, best Star Trek villain ever, Khan. (And if you are a Trekkie who disagrees, just try yelling "Booooooooooooorg!" It doesn't feel quite right, does it?)
Further developments were announced today on the progress of a film remake I had very much hoped would just go away, leaving me with the perfect cheesy mid-'80s kids' movie safely nestled in my memory along with catchy power ballads and squirt gum. Apparently, the Karate Kid remake is rolling along, with Jackie Chan joining the project as the new Mr. Miyagi. Therefore, I've decided to say to sweet fuck-all with the great memories, Hollywood -- why don't you just go and remake (and ruin) every film I hold dear? I know you're going to anyway. Here are a few films you could start with:
For a man who is notoriously the biggest part whore in all of Hollywood, it seems that Samuel L. Jackson may in fact not be playing a role that came his way. It's being reported that Jackson won't be returning as Nick Fury, Director of SHIELD, for any upcoming Marvel Comics movies. The actor, who had a small but no less cool cameo as Fury in an after-credit scene of this spring's smash Iron Man told the Los Angeles Times that he won't be appearing again as Nick Fury in any future Marvel Studios features. According to the actor, negotiations for his return broke down because "there seems to be an economic crisis in the Marvel Comics world." Psst, Sam. It's not just the Marvel Comics world, buddy. You may want to put down that Snakes on a Plane II script and pick up a newspaper.
It's difficult to sum up the oddball brilliance and hilarity of Hamlet 2. In a nutshell, it's the underdog tail of consummate loser Dana Marschz, a failed actor whose crippling daddy issues are at the root of his myriad problems. He's got a soul-crushing job as a high school drama teacher to a gaggle of aggressively indifferent hoods (and two conspicuously perky theater geeks), a floundering marriage to a bitch-on-wheels wife, played with cutting genius by Catherine Keener (who I'm beginning to worry is being type-cast as a castrating wench), and an unflagging desire to prove his relevance while simultaneously acknowledging that he's really really crappy at his chosen craft. All this while wearing an undercarriage-revealing caftan.
While talking up Terminator: Salvation last night, director McG wouldn't disclose whether or not those rumors about Ahnold making a cameo appearance were true. But when asked whether or not there would be some kind of "recap" of the first three movies in the new one, McG did reveal that they're "still trying to figure out what to do." No need to hurry or anything, McProcrastinator, what with just four months to go till the premiere. One option they're looking into, though, is having Sarah Connor open the movie with a voiceover. He didn't specify whether this would be the Linda Hamilton version from the first two movies or the Lena Headey version from the TV show, or some other option entirely. Here are a few reasons why the movie needs the Hamilton option.
Yesterday we ran down the four Spidey villains whose names had surfaced in connection with the next Spider-Man movie, although none of them have been confirmed. And while all of them --Carnage excepted -- are classic characters, Sam Raimi could do much better. After raiding our comic-book archive (and the occasionally brilliant comments on yesterday's article), we came up with four Spidey foes who would stand alongside the Green Goblin, Doctor Octopus, the Sandman and Venom as iconic and optically exciting antagonists. Read on, true believers!
Like a sweet, flaky Danish made with rancid butter, the possibility of a Breakfast at Tiffany's remake is impossible to keep down. Now gossip guru Liz Smith quotes Anne Hathaway as saying it would be "simply divine" to play Holly Golightly in a remake of the 1961 film that starred Audrey Hepburn in the same role. Okay, no, it wouldn't. Just ask Jennifer Love Hewitt about trying to recreate anything that Hepburn did first. Not so divine, was it?
Blog Categories
A Festival for the Rest...ival
25 Entries
Accidents Do Happen
46 Entries
Adventures in Fakery
77 Entries
Animation Desensitization
80 Entries
Awards Schmawards
17 Entries
Box Office Tally
79 Entries
Burning Questions
6 Entries
Coming Soonish
9 Entries
Cool Nerds Guide
6 Entries
Director? I Hardly Knew Her!
156 Entries
DVDs Unwrapped
25 Entries
For Your Amusement (Park)
10 Entries
Foreign Relations
54 Entries
Galleries (and Other Picture Postcards)
23 Entries
Gangster's Paradise
5 Entries
Getting Dramatic
5 Entries
Girls on Film
80 Entries
Happy Anniversary
10 Entries
Hollywood To TWoP: Hello There!
40 Entries
I Voted for GORE!
103 Entries
I Want My DVD
236 Entries
I Want My VOD
24 Entries
I've Got Two Tickets to Merchandise
33 Entries
IMDb Fun Times
6 Entries
Indie Snapshot
57 Entries
Indie, Indie, Come Back Home
40 Entries
It Came From New York
7 Entries
It Came From San Diego
14 Entries
It's a Major Award!
75 Entries
Legal Eaglese
21 Entries
Let's Blame the Media!
49 Entries
Let's Go To The Video!
29 Entries
Letterbox of Recommendations
22 Entries
Lights, Camera... Action Jackson!
184 Entries
Little TV Shows That Done Hit the Big Time
71 Entries
Martial Artistry
11 Entries
Momentous Occasions
25 Entries
More On Movies
38 Entries
Movie Merchandise
4 Entries
Musicalifornication
48 Entries
Obituaries Without Pity
23 Entries
Oscars and Grouchery
11 Entries
Pros and Controversy
26 Entries
Read All About It
5 Entries
Real People, Fake Movies
25 Entries
Remakes R Us
8 Entries
Reviews of Movies We Haven't Seen Yet
43 Entries
Reviews of Movies We've Actually Seen
517 Entries
Scary Monsters & Super Creeps
105 Entries
Sci-Fidelity
151 Entries
Script From the Headlines!
56 Entries
Separate but Sequel
249 Entries
Sequelitis
24 Entries
Shameless Self-Promotion
27 Entries
Sports in Our Shorts
7 Entries
Strike Watch
14 Entries
Stupid Cinematic Celebrity Sayings
34 Entries
Sundance Sundance Revolution
13 Entries
Taste the Reading Rainbow
94 Entries
The Biz
122 Entries
The Casting Conch
192 Entries
The History, Booooyyyyy!
80 Entries
The Kongs of Comedy
206 Entries
Theatre With an "R" and an "E"
11 Entries
Trailer Trashing
73 Entries
Trailers Without Pity
37 Entries
Video Games Killed the Movie Star
23 Entries
We Call Do-Over
177 Entries
We Watches the Watchmen
33 Entries
What's Up, Documentary?
17 Entries
When Animal Movies Attack
14 Entries
You Got Comic Book in My Movie
251 Entries
You Know, For Kids!
132 Entries