10 Upcoming Movies That Could Benefit From a Boycott

Good news for Angels & Demons! The Tom Hanks sequel/prequel to The DaVinci Code may be officially boycotted by the Catholic church. Why is that good news for the movie? Since the Vatican issued a statement last Friday, newspapers and websites from Cleveland to India have already helped spread the word. You couldn't buy that kind of publicity. Well, maybe you could, but it'd be expensive. With the economy being what it is and budgets being pinched, perhaps other movies could benefit from being boycotted from various groups. Although it's unlikely any organization would have quite the opposite-effect clout as the Catholic church, here are 10 movie suggestions with their potential naysayers.

1. Night at the Museum: Battle at the Smithsonian
Night at the Museum made a lot of money in 2006, but it'll need a boost if it wants to compete against Terminator Salvation, opening the same weekend.
Potential boycotter: The Smithsonian Institution
Why:The Smithsonian allowed some of the movie to be shot on location, but when they heard star Ben Stiller had signed on for Little Fockers, all bets were off.

2. Drag Me to Hell
This Sam Raimi horror flick is about a loan officer who's been cursed by an old lady she tried to evict from her home. It's coming out the same weekend as Pixar's balloon-driven fantasy Up, so it might get a little lost in the helium.
Potential boycotter: The American Bankers Association
Why: Like banks don't have enough of the public's ire right now? Plus, people might start getting ideas about putting curses on unscrupulous lenders.

3. The Taking of Pelham 1 2 3
The original was good, so people may wonder if it's worth seeing a remake with John Travolta as a subway train hijacker and Denzel Washington as the man who has to stop him.
Potential boycotter: New York Convention & Visitors Bureau
Why: Many tourists were already wary of taking the subway without the prospect of spending two hours trapped inside one with John Travolta and his truly hideous mustache.

4. Imagine That
This one looks fairly gentle, with a troubled financial executive immersed in his daughter's imaginary world, but Eddie Murphy in a fantasy comedy is already pretty well-trod territory.
Potential boycotters: Any number of convicted financial execs now in prison.
Why: It's insulting to imply that financial execs need a kid to be creative. They're very creative with finances all on their own, thanks.

5. The Post-Grad Survival Guide
Alexis Bledel is adorable, but can she carry a summer movie? The plot has her character suffering through joblessness after graduation.
Potential boycotters: Unsympathetic real post-grads.
Why: Actually, they don't have to officially boycott it. They just can't afford to go see first-run movies anymore.

6. Orphan
It's a movie about a creepy kid. How much more do you need to know?
Potential boycotters: Various adoption agencies.
Why: People need more incentive to adopt, not more incentive to run screaming away from little girls in pigtails.

7. The Ugly Truth
Katherine Heigl and Gerard Butler star in this rom-com. You can pretty much figure out everything you need to know from the poster: Stereotypical woman and stereotypical man spar, learn some awful/sappy/predictable "truths", and fall in love.
Potential boycotters: Kate Hudson and/or Matthew McConaughey
Why: It just seems like something they would have starred in.

8. G-Force
Guinea pigs are cute, but a whole movie of talking guinea pigs doing secret agent stuff may be a deal-breaker for some moviegoers.
Potential boycotter: The Rats of NIMH
Why: You want hyper-intelligent rodents? Just stick with the classic.

9. Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen
Certainly this sequel will cart off dough like a giant robotic dump truck, but some free publicity could help propel it past the $700M the first movie made.
Potential boycotter: United Auto Workers
Why: The US auto industry is losing enough jobs as it is without the cars assembling their own damn selves.

10. Inglourious Basterds
Quentin Tarantino's latest has a star-studded cast, but WWII movies haven't proved to be major blockbusters in recent years.
Potential boycotter: The Scripps National Spelling Bee
Why: The title might teach kids how to be pritty terrable spellars.

What movies do you think could benefit from a publicity-stirring boycott? What others should just be boycotted, period?

3 Comments

March 26, 2009 6:25 PM
Agent0042
Reply

ROTFL. At first, I thought this blog was a joke and these were all ideas for films that you guys had made up on the spot. Then, I Googled one of the titles.

March 26, 2009 10:56 PM
Ellen M
Reply

It IS pretty hard to believe that there is a movie called Drag Me to Hell. Especially if it doesn't involve drag queens.

March 27, 2009 7:40 AM
OOOOH!
Reply
replied to comment from Ellen M

I would pay to see your version, whether it was about a Drag-off, drag exorcists, or a secret society of transvestite spies.

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