Fantastic Four Reborn: Four Hints to Prevent Another Cinematic Abortion

Comic fans were psyched to finally get an official Fantastic Four movie in 2005, especially since the first attempt at a film ended up in Roger Corman's trash bin. The 2005 movie, while ridiculous, poorly acted and primarily played for laughs, still made enough money to get a second film greenlit, which led to the even more ridiculous Rise of the Silver Surfer. It was also more costly, so when it actually brought in less at the box office, 20th Century Fox knew they had to make a change to keep their superhero franchise alive. Now, a reboot is in the works, and we've got four suggestions for how they can put the quartet back on track.

1. Play It Serious
Yes, there's always been friendly pranking between the Thing and the Human Torch in the comics, but wackiness and superheroes don't always go hand-in-hand so well on film. The occasional comedic element, like in the Spider-Man franchise, is okay, but too much humor can detract from the heroism and turn your whole movie into a joke. (See Ghost Rider. Or don't.) That means no supposedly funny montages of them getting used to their powers, no "accidental" nudity from the Invisible Woman (or the Human Torch, for that matter) and, for the love of God and Galactus, no Mr. Fantastic dance numbers.

2. Cast For Talent, Not Looks
While I can think of numerous actors who look more like Johnny Storm and Ben Grimm, Chris Evans' wisecracking Human Torch was actually one of the best, most accurate parts of the movie, with Michael Chiklis' soulful Thing a close second. But Ioan Gruffud was too young to play Mr. Fantastic, and simply adding a little grey at the temples didn't help sell the whole "distinguished" vibe. And I'm not saying Jessica Alba is a bad actor, but I barely believe her as a human being, let alone as a smart, tough, blonde scientist. Seriously, she'd be pretty no matter what her hair color was, but the blonde thing does not work on her.

3. Hello, Computers!
I can't believe I'm saying this, but maybe we should think about a CGI version of the Thing. I'm normally an advocate for practical effects, and the rubber suit Michael Chiklis wore was a great way to capture the realism of the Thing's rocky form, but technology has come a long way, and I'd love to see something a little more comic-accurate, meaning rockier, craggier and above all bigger. Because who doesn't love a big Thing?

4. A Bad Villain Spells "Doom"
Since this is a reboot, I'm assuming we'll also have to deal with the iconic FF villain, Dr. Doom, but I think the first film's producers took the idea of Victor Von Doom's vanity a little too far when they cast the hunky Julian McMahon in the role. And the complete overhaul of the character's origins was interesting, but maybe a return to the comic's roots is in order. Or, here's an idea, give us a Victor tease in the first act, then give us another, flashier and more dynamic villain for them to kick things off against. Mole Man and his giant underground monsters appeared in the FF's first comic book adventure, so that might be a way to start the new franchise off fresh, and give Doom a rest.

What do you want to see in a Fantastic Four reboot? Let us know below, then check out our guide to disappointing third installments in superhero franchises.

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