The 16 Most Ridiculous Things About Eclipse

I tore through these books a few years back like a crack addict desperate for a fix, but these movies... they might be the death of me. And yet, I still force myself to go see them to see just how terrible they are. On the one hand, they are hysterical (especially the newest one), but on the other hand, I'm not entirely sure that they're in on the joke. Like, should I be laughing when newborn vampires are eviscerating a poor soul because their leader Riley just has the dumbest look on his face? Probably not, but it totally makes me giggle to no end. Writing a review of this is pointless, since, judging by the hordes of teens and moms at the theater near my house at 10 PM, this movie is going to make a gazillion dollars no matter how awful it may be or how much of a set-up it is for the last two films (which have the most preposterous plot... I can't even...), and people will turn out in droves, plan parties, start rival gang wars, buy merchandise, set up shrines, etc... But before you're forced to take your favorite pre-teen (or drooling spouse) to the film, find out what insanity this latest Twilight installment has in store. Fair warning, the text below does contain a great deal of spoilers, but if you haven't read the books and you're planning on seeing this anyway, you probably really don't care.

The Overhead Shots
New Moon had that terrible circulating shot where the camera just spun around Bella for like 15 minutes while the seasons changed, but this one is obsessed with shooting everything from above, from houses to chase scenes to cars driving, they must have spent the entire budget on these shots... well, that, and the hair person who actually made Kristen Stewart's mop look shiny and full of body. That person deserves a raise.

Zooming in on Jacob's chest
When they weren't busy shooting people running from above, the director and DP made the not-altogether-unwise choice to focus in on Taylor Lautner's chest. Ostensibly, it was often meant to show that he has a beating heart, as opposed to Edward, but it really seemed like more of an excuse to show off Lautner's newly ripped physique. Nice for some viewers, but still pandering and so blatantly obvious that the joke about him never wearing a shirt got a huge roar from the audience.

The Sparkling Scenes
You would think that, now that we're on the third film, they would have found a way to make the sparkling look less like Edward just stepped into a Swarovski store and they turned on a glittery disco ball, but you'd be wrong.

The Less-Than-Sparkling Dialogue
A lot of this dialogue is taken straight from Ms. Meyer's book, but somehow it reads less corny than it sounds when verbalized. I should have learned this when I staged my dramatic reading of this for my friends, but it really took this particular film for it to hit home. When Bella says, "From now on, I'm Switzerland" when she can't decide between the two hunky fellas, I audibly groaned. If the theatergoers around me hadn't been quite so verbal about talking to the screen and each other throughout the film, I might have felt bad.

Jacob Being All Serious
Jacob professing his love for Bella all seriously? Funniest thing I've seen in ages. He just looks like a lost little puppy dog. OK, maybe it wasn't so ridiculous, as this was probably one of the most realistic teen moments of the film, but the delivery is just so overacted that it's hard to take him seriously as a love interest for Bella. His pouty wishing her dead? Adorable, but that totally misses the point.

Bella's Occasionally Random Voiceovers
The film starts with Kristen Stewart's voice as she reads poetry, which makes some sense, but then the voiceover disappears. That is, until there's one random sequence where Jacob and Edward are both standing guard at Bella's house, and all of a sudden the voiceover picks up again... and then fades off for good. Not that I particular care about Bella's really deep thoughts, but I wish that they would have made up their minds if they were using that technique or not.

The "Scary" Music
I love that the scoring of this movie is so crazily obvious that they feel the need to play music that is supposed to give you chills when someone is in danger. However, the orchestrations they selected don't sound even vaguely ominous, and instead come across as some little kid trying to play spooky music on a tinkly piano.

The Entire Tent Sequence
I'm not even sure where to start, but when Bella is freezing in a pup-tent with Edward unable to provide her warmth, Jacob (who is standing by), comes in from the blizzard, totally unclothed and warms her up... while Edward is watching. And makes comments about how she'd heat up faster if she was naked. He and Edward also basically have a dick-measuring contest over Bella's head once she's asleep.

The Graduation Speech
Apparently, someone realize that Anna Kendrick was the most credible actress in this entire mess and decided that they needed to give her something to do. They saddled her with a graduation speech that was all about not making rash life-changing decisions post-high school and instead just making crazy mistakes. It was a way for the filmmakers to focus more on Bella's big "choice", and even though Kendrick did her best delivery, it was unnecessary and just way too obvious.

Patting a Human/Wolf
Sure, the wolf pack looks cuddly in their were-forms, but it seems more than a little condescending that, when nuzzled by giant wolf Jacob, Bella would react by petting him on the head, as if he was a puppy who retrieved a frisbee instead of her giant beast of a best friend who's about to put his life at risk in order to protect her mostly useless ass.

Rosalie Trying to be Badass
Nikki Reed is not now, nor will she ever be, able to pull off a tough chick. I've often complained about her miscasting as the most beautiful, ethereal creature in the world (and I still stand by that), but during her flashback she's supposed to be a classy beauty who gets gang-raped by her fiancé and his friends and then goes on a vengeance spree while wearing her wedding dress. She doesn't quite get there. Her angry face is completely laughable.

The Waiting Game
Sure, vampires having sex with humans could kill them, but seeing Edward almost have sex with his beloved Bella and then stop and then basically coerce her into marrying him (by asking like 20 times, even though she repeatedly claims not to believe in marriage... especially at her age) is somehow less honorable and more like he's just kind of not that into her. And then he does let Jacob sleep next to her, instead of buying one of those sub-zero sleeping bags. And he doesn't even take her to their graduation party. And he only buys her a grad gift after Jacob gives her something. Some boyfriend.

The Sheer Amount of Screen Time Devoted to People Standing Still
There's a war brewing, so the Cullen clan just stands there. Literally stands there. For ages. Yes, they were waiting for the newborn vampires to arrive so they'd have the home-field advantage, but just standing there... we don't need to see that. The werewolf pack also spends a great deal of time just standing on a porch. Did someone forget to tell the folks with non-speaking roles that they needed to pay attention?

Eternal Vampires Changing Their Appearance
I didn't think that I'd be bothered by Bryce Dallas Howard taking over/stealing the Victoria role from Rachelle Lefevre, but I really was. Even though the actresses have a similar appearance, it was highly distracting to me that a vampire who is supposed to look the same for hundreds of years looks different now. Not to mention the fact that Bryce Dallas Howard should be able to do so much better. Her vacant, vaguely lusty, slightly bloodthirsty portrayal of this film's baddest bad girl was pretty terrible. However, I did like it when her head was forcibly removed from her body. That part was satisfying.

Never Mind the Weather
I am from Maine. I know all about going out in the snow without the proper attire. However, in this film, on the day after a major blizzard in which Bella was forced to huddle with Jacob for warmth, when it still seems to be sporadically snowing, it should have been brisk or at least quite chilly. That doesn't matter to Bella, as she is wandering around in a pair of too-tight jeans, an unbuttoned flannel shirt rolled up to her elbows and absolutely no coat or gloves or whatever for quite a while. Long enough for her to have deep conversations with Edward and Jacob about the state of their relationships and watch her boyfriend decapitate her mortal enemy. If cuddling up to Jacob and kissing him can give off enough body heat to keep her warm all day, send me one of those werewolves next winter. I could save money on coats and my heating bill.

The Lord of the Rings-Style Neverending Ending
It doesn't matter to me where the book left off, but cinematically it would have been far more dramatic to have it end after the Volturi had issued their threats, with the fate of Jacob up in the air and a sense of uncertainty. Instead, after the fade to black, we saw Bella trek down to the reservation to see an injured Jacob and crush his spirit some more, and then there was another fade to black which led to her playing in the fields with Edward, finally putting on her engagement ring and joking about her dad. Sure, it's a happier ending that way -- well, unless you consider the fact that a teenage girl is basically agreeing to kill herself so that she can be with the man she loves before she gets wrinkles and needs botox -- but I guess the romantics don't want to dwell on that.

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70 Comments

July 1, 2010 6:22 PM
Jennifer
Reply

Her hair looked great because it was a wig. That's also why she finally stopped playing with it all the time.

July 1, 2010 8:59 PM
Hayley
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Brilliant! This is the funniest thing I've read all week! I can't WAIT to see the film because I'll be laughing my head off remembering this article and annoying the hell out of all the Twi-Hards around me! Hahaha!

July 1, 2010 9:31 PM
shaun
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Haven't seen the film or read the books, so forgive me if I'm wrong about this, but doesn't the whole thing take place in Washington state? I lived in Vancouver, BC, for a few years. There, you could get the occasional major snowfall, but it would be nice and warm the next day. So, Bella not needing warm clothing the day after a blizzard may not be a stretch.

July 1, 2010 9:33 PM
shaun
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If this takes place in Washington state, it's not far-fetched that the day after a blizzard would be nice and warm.

July 1, 2010 11:00 PM
SaneN85
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I live in Washington state and usually after a snowstorm, you will need a jacket.

July 1, 2010 11:01 PM
SaneN85
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Heck, her outfit would barely work in our "normal" weather.

July 2, 2010 1:30 AM
Catherine Elizabeth
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In the book the battle takes place in June sooo the clothing was not so much of an issue.

July 2, 2010 6:51 AM
sharry
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I would not mind wearing nothing with Edward on my side. but seriously Bella's outfit is really crazy...Maybe trying to seduce my Edward? hahaha

July 2, 2010 9:25 AM
Kari
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Every time I heard the name Riley, I expected Marc Blucas to show up on screen. No idea why.

July 2, 2010 9:52 AM
Lisa
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Kari, that is FUNNY. Any Riley will always be Marc Blucas to me too.

July 2, 2010 11:20 AM
Leah
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This series is just, it's just, I can't even deal with how stupid this is. I swear to god, if this goes on much longer I don't know what I'm going to do. Did you know you can buy her engagement ring online? FOR REALS.

July 2, 2010 11:41 AM
celia
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Really insightful. Brilliant analysis. The author is so very very cool. Teen angst is so funny. Vampires and werewolves are hysterical. And the millions worldwide who love the books and movies don't even know how stupid they are. Can't wait to scream with laughter at the summer's funniest film and all the nerds sitting in the theater with me! I'll be the only cool person there.

July 2, 2010 12:30 PM
Juan
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Celia you are going to be a real cool person in a theater going to see a film you think is stupid, with all the people you think are stupid. all the time giving your money to the stupid movie studios. haha I for one dont like the movies but enjoyed reading the books. so i wait for this to come out on DVD and get it through net flix, like a true cool person would. Stop hiding your love for the twilight sage with fake hater-aide.

July 2, 2010 1:28 PM
Anonymous
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replied to comment from Kari

he, me too!

July 2, 2010 2:23 PM
Tess
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Jacob to Edward in the tent: "I'm hotter." Priceless! and earned an audible laugh from me!

July 2, 2010 4:00 PM
Jessica
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Seriously, if you are over 12 and you read or watch these films you are a grade-A IDIOT! This series has single handedly DISTROYED the vampire saga. Have you ever seen an interview with Stephanie Meyer? She's a forty year old woman who giggles and talks about boys like a school girl! Please, dear god, don't EVER show Robert Pattinson with his shirt off again, and STOP CASTING STONER KRISTIN STEWART!

July 2, 2010 5:15 PM
Kat
Reply
replied to comment from Leah

You can also buy a "realistic" sparkle-peen dildo that shines just like edward's. They recommend you "put it in the freezer for that extra special realism".... the world is gonna end next week, sign of the apocalypse that is. Some excessive fandom I can understand, but that... good lordy...

July 2, 2010 6:22 PM
shay-d-lady
Reply
replied to comment from SaneN85

girl you are a member everywhere!!!

July 2, 2010 6:42 PM
Anonymous
Reply
replied to comment from Hayley

No, you have to get the terminology correct - they're called twi-TARDS. Remember that in the future, please.

July 2, 2010 8:59 PM
Sunshine
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hahahaha i guess soo...
i saw the movie and i guess i agree on some parts but like on others i really dont hahaha i guess soo... TEAM SWITZERLAND!

July 2, 2010 9:21 PM
Bailey
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Can't decide what I'm laughing at more: the article, Celia's attempting to hide her rage with sarcasm, or Juan completely missing that Celia was offended, not amused.

July 3, 2010 1:27 AM
Jennifer
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Okay, now all I can think about is Marc Blucas coming out of the water.
And the dildo? Eeeew.

July 3, 2010 8:53 AM
Alline
Reply
replied to comment from Kat

Now, this is one of THE most disturbing things I've ever read!

July 3, 2010 10:08 AM
Craig
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If the staff at TWoP have been damaging their brains by reading the Twilight books, that would explain the precipitous drop in quality of the website.

July 3, 2010 10:41 AM
Gitano
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I actually thought her hair was terrible in this film. The wig was far worse than her regular hair which was almost (ALMOST) attractive at points in the previous films.

You've actually hit on two of my biggest beefs with this movie (I like the series so I conveniently overlook things like bad acting and the horrible dialogue--which I blame more on Meyer than the screenwriter).

1) I hate, hate, hate Nikki Reed as Rosalie. She can't act, and not only is she not incredibly beautiful as the book describes, they've actually made her look ugly by trying to beautify her. It was particularly bad in this film; I felt like I couldn't even look at her face.

2) The "it was blizzarding last night but today we can all spend hours outside in just our shirt sleeves" thing just killed me. There was no explanation for it. It's almost like the costumer just forgot what the CGI background of those scenes looked like.

July 3, 2010 5:18 PM
Vi
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A TWoP staff member devouring the twilight series? Yikes.

Celia ease up on the anger. If people are coming to this site for cuddly reviews and commentary, they've come to the wrong place. I don't come here for nice. I come here for snark.

July 3, 2010 5:44 PM
chris
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"Nikki Reed is not now, nor will she ever be, able to pull off a tough chick."

How about an evil one? Her role in the movie "Thirteen" was pretty damn scary.

July 3, 2010 6:34 PM
Sunny
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The worst things about this movie series is how they romanticize Bella's helplessness and uselessness and that she needs to be taken care of and catered like a child like it's an attractive quality. She doesn't mature and she doesn't get stronger emotionally, she's dependant on Edward for everything. I can't believe she and Edward are the model of tru luv.

July 3, 2010 7:38 PM
Jakeiveance T.
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Oh God, here's yet another HATER!!! Are you like dumb or something...The movie has made over 100 million in four days and if that still isn't enough for you to get your head out of your ass and see that this is something way bigger than something that doesn't matter AKA you, then maybe you're just really, really STUPID. stop being a jerk and a d*@k. If you dont like the movies then save your breath and just don't talk about them. Nobpdy cares what you have to say... well maybe the other Twilight haters that also need to get a life and stop throwing temper tantrums over movies do, but everybody that matters, doesn't care... stop being childish, grow up, and get a life. Peace out Bi#$ches!!!

July 3, 2010 7:44 PM
Jakeiveance T.
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...Another thing... I can't believe i wasted my time looking at this stupid article.... And just shut up about this ruining vampires! If you were really smart and knew anything then you would know that they aren't real and that gives you free reign to make whatever you want of them... SO STUPID.... okay, I think I've said everything I have to say... i might come back with more. Really don't care what anyone has to say about it... It is what it is...

July 3, 2010 8:11 PM
Alison
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What I really liked was that apparently the vampires were made of glass or porceline (so when they were ripped up it wasn't gory) but also gasoline, so that when set on fire then went up fast and bright.

The movie was a good funny-bad movie. I hadn't seen the previous two, but I read the books on the insistence of a friend. Boy was the sparkling funny.

July 3, 2010 11:09 PM
Liz Lemon
Reply
replied to comment from Jakeiveance T.

I'm proud to say that I've never watched a Twilight film in my life. The book was recommended by a friend, suffice it to say halfway through it I stopped. I can't stomach such garbage and I am a fan of paranormal romance books, be it YA or more mature. Its really incredible how many people are obsessed with this series.

Oooh they sparkle. Bleh.

July 4, 2010 1:26 AM
mischka
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its fantasy, vampires are not 'real' therefore your imagination can run amok w/out answering to anyone (even to those who profess to know what vampires should be or shouldnt be)

July 4, 2010 2:58 AM
Anonny
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replied to comment from Jakeiveance T.

Sigh, another Twilight lover trying to save her dignity. Admit it, the series is pretty bad, you're just too embarrassed about liking it to say so. If you weren't drowning with the crocodiles in denial, you wouldn't be ranting so angrily. ;) It's okay, just don't take yourself so seriously.

Just because it's fiction doesn't mean you can do whatever and not explain. It's okay, most of the fans who use that whole "LOL IT'S FICTION!1!!!1" shtick aren't writers anyways. Or if they are, they obviously aren't good ones.

July 4, 2010 3:14 AM
Noir
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The best part about all this is that Eclipse is the best book/movie out of the entire franchise; unless they manage a miracle and polish up Breaking Dawn--but that would require a rewrite the entire Twilight fanbase would probably embrace. That's the problem with these books: great idea, but the execution was so steeped with Meyer's writing inexperience to the point where you really have to take it as a guilty pleasure or abhor it altogether.

July 4, 2010 1:13 PM
Gwen
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I also tore through the books and was surprised at how much I liked them. Well, except for Breaking Dawn which is probably THE worst book I have ever read.

Then I went to see Twilight. OMG - could it have been any worse. New Moon was just a smidge better. Haven't seen Eclipse and probably won't.

It's a shame that books that were so appealing to so many tweens couldn't have been made into decent movies. Perhaps the PTB should have watched "Being Human" on BBC for tips on how to do special effects and on how to write a credible script.

July 4, 2010 4:50 PM
Vega
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"He and Edward also basically have a dick-measuring contest over Bella's head once she's asleep."

Thanks for that visual.
Although that totaly should be in the porn version. :))

July 4, 2010 11:31 PM
ashleighlauren
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I'm so glad I read this. I was starting to worry that it was just me. I went to see the movie Friday (don't judge, I had good reasons). It was so bad that it looped around to good again. It was cheesetastically hilarious.

@Sunny, I totally agree. Not only do they romanticize Bella's helplessness, but they also glamorize the extremely disturbing possessiveness and creepy stalker vibe of Edward. Bella is basically his property, and he's constantly telling her what to do (including whether she can talk to Jacob). Not to mention that he was completely willing to let Bella freeze rather than have Jacob lay next to her.

I went into the film team nobody, but I'm kind of team Jacob find someone else and run away from Bella now.

July 5, 2010 12:16 AM
Alison
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Actually, what I thought was weirdest was all the scenes where Jacob carried her around, all while he was shirtless.

Thanks, producers of Twilight for making me feel weird because I had to stare at a teenager's chest for 2 hours.

July 5, 2010 12:30 AM
Katherine
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For all of you talking about the bad writing or the romanticizingof Bella's helplessness, please go read the HUNGER GAMES...now ThERE is a series. Well written with a kick a$$ teen girl heroine. Beat series I've read in years... And going to be a movie next year.

July 5, 2010 4:12 AM
Dana
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I've read all the books and I loved them. I know I shouldn't but I do. The movies kind of make it obvious how ridiculous the series really is. Even knowing that, I don't care. I'm still going to be one of the suckers who will see this movie and I'm even going to drag my poor sister who's never read or seen other twilight books/movies along and probably love every minute of it. Also as a side note I hate when people who HATE something feel the need to read articles or post hate comments on youtube about how crappy of whatever said show/movie is and that anyone who likes it is stupid or doesn't have a life. I just don't get it. If I don't like something I don't watch it and read/watch things about it online and post comments about how much I hate it. These people have way too much time on their hands if they're using it on something they don't like. It's okay if you don't like/hate twilight but why waste your time with it?

July 5, 2010 4:32 AM
Rena
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I don't believe I've managed to read past the 1st chapter of the first book, since it was filled with mistakes and irritatingly dull. Never watched the movies, but did read the reviews out of curiosity.

Besides - this article isn't supporting the movie, it's pointing out the mistakes. Haters gonna hate. The entire franchise is either hate/love. I'll stick with hating it.

July 5, 2010 8:18 AM
handtalker
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The movie was bad, for all the reasons the article listed. But worse, it was...boring. That was the longest 2 hours of my life! I'd rather unintentional hilarity (Twilight)than super slow pacing & *yawn* boredom.

July 5, 2010 9:02 AM
Vanessa
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Oh and I agree with you guys about Edward. The guy is insecure, self-hating, extremely broody, miserable all around, a stalker, possessive, jealous, manipulative, and a terrible boyfriend all around. WHAT? Why the hell would anyone thing that is romantic? It's horrible and obviously tells a lot about Stephanie Meyer's love life, which makes it very clear why she would write childish vampire love stories like this, and try to convince everybody that psycho bfs are not really psycho, but just love way strongly, which is like the most amazing romantic thing evur. LOL

July 5, 2010 3:00 PM
Anonymous
Reply
replied to comment from ashleighlauren

I agree it was so bad it was almost good in an unintentional way. I found it humorous. Fortunately the crowd I was in seemed to feel the same. I went with a friend who enjoyed the books (I never read them) but loves rolling her eyes at the movies. Maybe Bella was not as lame in the books but I couldn't fathom why anyone would fight over her. She bored me & seemed unintelligent. But I did enjoy the wolf's chest & I decided if they were going to devote a separate storyline just to it then I wouldn't feel sleazy for staring.

July 5, 2010 4:47 PM
anon
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I totally disagree with Angel--the movies are 100% better than the books (I admit, this isn't saying much). The director of Eclipse managed to cut out almost all of the parts where Edward kidnaps Bella or otherwise holds her against her will to keep her from seeing Jacob. Which was pretty much the 3/4 of the book. Ugh. And Kristen Stewart manages to give a modicum of agency to the shell that is Bella. And I think the way Robert Pattison looks totally disgusted at the idea of having sex is a a brilliant portrayal of how f'd up the Edward character is. Long live the movies, burn those books!

July 5, 2010 10:07 PM
Kristin
Reply

More than the fact that Bella needs to rug up in the snow, why is it snowing in June? No one seems to notice the fact that it wouldnt be snowing in the first place. Any of you Washingtonians have an answer for that?

July 6, 2010 11:02 AM
liz,
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i loved the books.i haven't really been happy with any of the movies.i think steph sold out.she let them mutilate what i thought was a very sweet love story with i might add an awful lot of moralistic value,the only good thing about these movies is that rpatz looks better in each one.huge chunks of the book are left out of the movies,which are pertinent to the story.it makes me sick.it's very disappointing.s.m. should have waited until someone with enough money could back her,so that the movies could have been done right.

July 6, 2010 11:37 AM
Ashley
Reply

By far this is the greatest thing ever. After my sister made me see the first movie i started reading the books. I dont read that much so the first book took me forever to read finally i just said forget it and started reading the second book. I read the first couple chapters then put it down for about 4-6 months, then found out that the second movie was coming out and told my sister that we have to go see it and she said she would not go with me until i finish at least the second book. So i picked it up and finished it within a couple days. Like you said, i got the fix but i needed more. Like a crack head, i went out and bought more. Got the third book finished it in 6 days then went and bought the fourth book and finish it within 5 days. Now i did this all at work which is funny bc i work retail. but damnit it got me in it and i am hooked. I loved the third movie better than any of the first two but it did have its moments. Also, my sister and i were dying laughing at all the prosta-tots in the theater. Any way, i will be checking it out again. Love it or hate it, i couldn't really give a damn.

July 6, 2010 11:40 AM
Kelli
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It is just entertainment people..stop being so melo-dramatic..This author and these actors are making millions; do you really think they care what normal people have to say? ABSOLUTELY NOT!

July 6, 2010 12:24 PM
Kathy
Reply
replied to comment from liz,

Agree totally.

July 6, 2010 1:11 PM
Anonymous
Reply
replied to comment from Kari

Yes! Buffy. Hahahaha,

July 6, 2010 2:07 PM
Anonymous
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I read first 2 books, rolled my eyes every page and finally gave up. The books and movies suck and Wuthering Heights does NOT need and endorsement from fucking bella! Hey Twihards want a good show about vampires? Try Buffy. Want some good romance? Try Outlander or any Laura Kinsales for that matter.

July 6, 2010 2:41 PM
Melody
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While it wasn't touched on in the movie, Edward got Bella a graduation gift after seeing that she accepted one from Jacob because in the book she was constantly asking him not to buy her things, including a graduation gift. He griped to her (and rightfully so, I think) about accepting one from Jacob but not one from him, her boyfriend. But, this was not once touched on in the movie, which could have easily been fit in with a quick line.

July 6, 2010 9:22 PM
Jamie
Reply

Obviously you were a big fan of the books...if you weren't you wouldn't have craved them like "crack". The films have followed the books exactly (while cutting a few unnecessary scenes). While I do agree that Bryce Dallas-Howard playing Victoria was a mistake, I disagree with you on everything else. It's a movie franchise built around YOUNG ADULT books. The films, are therefore, going to be the same way. I, for one, loved the books and have re-read them. I'm also a fan of the movies. I don't have an Edward shrine, but I can appreciate the films and books for what they are: FICTION. Please let the professionals (oh, I don't know, like Roeper and Ebert) critique the movies and go back to you job making coffee at Starbucks.

July 6, 2010 10:36 PM
Sarah
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HAHA. "Bella would react by petting him on the head, as if he was a puppy who retrieved a frisbee instead of her giant beast of a best friend who's about to put his life at risk in order to protect her mostly useless ass." made me laugh so hard.

July 6, 2010 11:51 PM
Lauren
Reply

While watchin this movie with my mom she said "Why don't they just let her die?" I couldnt come up with an answer that made sense except that it's a fiction vampire/werewolf movie & she's the only human who knows...why let her die? lol

July 7, 2010 3:06 AM
TVDIVA
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How is it that you got what everyone else missed in their reviews of the movie? This was great - honest and hilarious. Thank you.

July 7, 2010 9:40 AM
tcal
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Amamzing ! How easy it is to be so critical!!! And what jobs do you have that pays millions?? Have you looked at yourself lately?? I have enjoyed the movies.Remember , it is just for your entertainment! It's not real!

July 7, 2010 10:25 AM
Leslie
Reply
replied to comment from Hayley

Why do you have to be a hater?

July 7, 2010 12:31 PM
MKik
Reply

I cannot believe you thought the wigs looked good. All of them were awful....I blame Kristen Stewart in the end for cutting her hair into a femullet, but seriously, it totally looked like a knock off wig...

July 7, 2010 1:44 PM
Keani
Reply

OMG hahaha stupid haters.....they will never learn :)) :P

July 7, 2010 11:40 PM
Clare
Reply
replied to comment from Kristin

YES YES YES! I thought that that was the single most ridiculous thing in the movie. When it started BLIZZARDING, my jaw dropped. Yes Washington is well known for its crazy weather, and this year we hit a record for going the longest without breaking 75, but that is just insane. Sometimes there will be little patches of snow that haven't melted out yet in July, and the bigger mountains like Ranier or Baker have snow all year round, but not a freaking blizzard in June... to top that, the scene in the beginning when Riley gets changed depicted rain coming down in buckets, but that rarely happens, even in Forks or Seattle. More often than not we will just get a very slight drizzle. (It would probably be more believable if that scene were set in Forks, since the Peninsula gets way more rain than Seattle (heck, New York or Chicago probably get more rain than we do.), but his "Missing" poster said he was going towards Pike Place Market, which is in Seattle... It was quite hilarious actually...

July 31, 2010 8:33 PM
Karen
Reply

Loved the books, love the movies, love this review! Yes, I recognize Twilight is absolutely ridiculous and juvenile (and I am far too old for it) but I don't care, it's silly fun and I enjoy it!

January 21, 2011 4:50 PM
jack
Reply

well i think that edward is a total looser and bella well she is ok exept in the movies she just needs to love 1 person. i personly think bella should go out with jacob because he is cool

January 21, 2011 4:53 PM
mathan
Reply
replied to comment from Karen

well out of the 3 movies i like eclipse more it is a bit like a romantic movie it needs more action but i think it is good to.

January 21, 2011 4:57 PM
nathan
Reply
replied to comment from tcal

i agre with you it is just a movie and it is for peoples entertainment. And your right what jobs pay you millions.

January 21, 2011 5:00 PM
nathan
Reply
replied to comment from liz,

i also totaly agree

August 21, 2011 5:39 AM
Julz
Reply

A bit surrpised it seems to simple and yet useful.

August 22, 2011 3:57 PM
Pepper
Reply

I'm not easily imerpssed. . . but that's impressing me! :)

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