<I>Breaking Dawn, Part 2</I>: After About 12 False Endings, <i>Twilight</i> Is Finally Over!

Look, if you've seen the other four movies and loved them, you're going to love this one, too. If you enjoy hate-watching them (like we usually do), there's plenty for you here as well. If you hated them and somehow think this one is going to be miraculously better, then you've got another thing coming. Or, if you are like the young woman sitting behind us at the screening who had never seen any part of the saga before, you will ask a million questions throughout the movie about the characters, laugh at unfunny things and then think it was a quality movie. Don't be that person.

<I>Breaking Dawn: Part 1</I> — The Most Ridiculous <I>Twilight</i> Installment Yet!

As I said the last time I reviewed one of these Twilight "films", writing a proper review is utterly pointless because the fans of these books are going to go see it, no matter how hard any critic out there may try and dissuade them. But while I really despised the majority of Eclipse, I've been desperately in need of a good laugh and there is nothing more preposterous than the fourth installment in this series. The Breaking Dawn book was so insanely bizarre that I almost couldn't wait to see this dreck in living color. And... it was everything I could have hoped for and worse. And don't worry, Twiharders, Bill Condon does absolutely nothing to elevate the quality of this material, so you don't need to imagine that an acclaimed director was somehow able to change the ridiculous storytelling of Stephenie Meyer and make it passable for normal human consumption. It is still the terrible mess that she created, now with bonus terrible acting. And it's stretched out for two movies. They want all your money. After seeing where they ended this one, and watching how padded out this was, there is absolutely no reason this couldn't be a single film. This isn't The Hobbit, it's Twilight. Even worse, this first installment didn't even end where it logically should have based on the novel -- instead, it kept going for what seemed like an eternity. Still, I did laugh... a lot. So here's a look at the most ridiculous things about the film. [If you are a spoilerphobe and actually care about Twilight, stop reading now.]

I Want My DVD: Tuesday, February 26, 2013

by Ethan Alter February 26, 2013 6:00 am
I Want My DVD: Tuesday, February 26, 2013

We talk about PTA's The Master once more, with feeling. Read Full Entry »

I Want My DVD: Tuesday, February 7, 2012

by Ethan Alter February 7, 2012 6:00 am
I Want My DVD: Tuesday, February 7, 2012

Forget White Castle -- Harold and Kumar have entered the Claymation dimension.

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