I fully admit that my inner twelve-year-old could not be suppressed when reading about James Franco and Sean Penn's new project Milk. I will even admit that the juvenile and annoying elementary school playground rhyme, "Milk, milk, lemonade, round the corner..." popped into my head at the end of the first sentence and it took me about fifteen seconds to regain my composure. That said, I dare you to remain a grown-up while reading this. I won't say it can't be done, but then, you're probably a better person than me. The news here seems to be not the project itself--a film about politician and activist Harvey Milk (Penn), who in 1977 was the first openly gay American man to be elected to office--but that Penn, who will play Milk, and Franco, who will play one of his lovers, will don prosthetic penises in all their nude scenes. Dude. I can't even type "penis" without tittering. I hope the make-up artist who had to apply the prosthesis has a lot more decorum than I.
Word from the set was that during the half-day shoot for a scene in which Franco jumps in a pool naked, Penn didn't realize he was wearing a prosthetic. When Franco asked him "you wouldn't do a scene like this if they asked you, you wouldn't dive into a pool naked?" Penn responded, "James, if I was built like you, I would." As most men would (I'm guessing), Franco didn't reveal until a later scene in which they were both naked and dancing that he was also wearing a prosthetic. Twenty bucks says that story gets more press than the movie itself.
The Penn-directed film, slated to open December 5th, also stars Josh Brolin, Emile Hirsch and Victor Garber, among others. No word on whether any of them had to don the old Boogie Nights beast. Now I'm off to sit down for a self-imposed time-out and a quick prayer that my mother doesn't read this.