Ten Ways Mickey Rourke's Life Will Change If He Wins the Oscar

After nearly two decades spent in B-movies, thankless roles and boxing rings, Mickey Rourke is once again being praised for his acting, and he stands on the brink of winning the most prestigious acting award in the land -- the Academy Award for Best Actor. If he wins, it's a total game-changer, and his life and career have the potential to improve dramatically. We've thought about it, and come up with a list of ways that Rourke's life will change once he's holding that little gold statue in his hands.

1. Harley Davidson and the Marlboro Man 2: The Smokening pretty much a done deal.

2. He'll have a real Oscar to go on the mantle next to the fake Oscar that Paul Reiser gave him.

3. He's always wanted to do a Merchant Ivory picture.

4. He can have his dentist melt down part of the Oscar statue to get some much-needed fillings.

5. He no longer has to accept Marvel Studios' offer to do Iron Man 2 in exchange for Subway coupons.

6. Finally, something to keep the kitchen table from wobbling.

7. He can afford to get his chihuahua Loki stuffed, rather than simply keeping him in the refrigerator next to the peas.

8. Lisa Bonet might return his calls.

9. All of those copies of the novelization of Wild Orchid he signed will actually be worth something.

10. He can finally get his old face out of hock.

Do you think Mickey Rourke will take it? Sound off below.




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Movies Without Pity

October 2013


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