A lot of analysis has been done on the increasing number of ensemble films on the marketplace. Movies like The Expendables, Valentine's Day and the upcoming Red stack the deck with stars, either to optimize NetFlix recommendations or simply to draw in the widest audience possible. The latter might be what Bruce Campbell is going for, as he plans to make a horror movie with "so many horror movie stars that people can't possibly not see the movie." Somehow, we think that people will be able to resist the siren song of Kane Hodder and Robert Englund in a sequel to My Name is Bruce, especially since it seems like most horror movies nowadays are simply there to employ washed-up horror stars (i.e. Behind the Mask, Hatchet). But the idea of applying that team-of-all-stars premise to other genres seems like it might have legs. Here are some genre-fied Expendables movies that would put butts in seats.
The Off-Worlders (sci-fi)
Cast: Hamill. Reeves. Ford. Shatner. Weaver. Weaving. Biehn. Hauer. Nimoy. Fishburne. Quaid.
Premise: When ten stasis pods are recovered in deep space, they're discovered to be from a starship that vanished 100 years ago. All of the pods' inhabitants have aged at different rates due to damage incurred in the initial attack, but, upon finding out how much their 100-year-old cargo is worth, they enlist the salvage team's help in tracking down the home planet of the aliens who hijacked it.
Tagline: "Earth attacks."
The Fantasticals (fantasy)
Cast: Depp. Mortensen. Bale. McKellen. Huston. Connery. Neeson. Bellucci. Malkovich. Lambert.
Premise: When a kingdom far, far away is threatened by the encroachment of the real world, the knights who helped establish the peace have to don their armor once more and team up with their old foes -- witches, dragons and ogres -- to vanquish the tide of reality.
Tagline: "Happily ever after... isn't always for ever."
The Unkissables (romance)
Cast: Roberts. Firth. Lopez. Kutcher. Heigl. Jackman. Diaz. Diggs. Barrymore. O'Loughlin.
Premise: Ten single men and women who desperately need to find love ASAP (due to illness, inheritance, biological clocks, green cards, etc.) are sent to a resort by the world's best matchmaker, where they have to make a connection by the time they board the plane home, or else. But when they all turn out to know each other -- as professional rivals, childhood best friends or disastrous one-night-stands -- love may not be that easy.
Tagline: "Choose your soulmate."
The Tearjerkers (drama)
Cast: Wilkinson. Thompson. Irons. Streep. Eastwood. Close. Freeman. Mirren. Hopkins. Winslet. Binoche. Theron. Fiennes.
Premise: In a war-torn country, where the only careers are coal mining and prostitution, a dozen people die every day from bayonets, mine collapses or bombs. Four families struggle to live from day to day in this dangerous land, but when the violence strikes too close to home, they're forced to band together as one to survive, even if that means making decisions that place the value of the group over that of the individual, and performing acts that go against every fiber of their being. Also, all their children are dead.
Tagline: "Try not to cry."
The Unhecklables (comedy)
Cast: Carrey. Sandler. Garofalo. Stiller. Myers. Rock. Sedaris. Reynolds. Lawrence. Cleese. Tomlin.
Premise: When a comedy club is on the verge of being torn down, the talent who got their start there plan the mother of all comedy shows. But it's all to divert attention from their real mission: to use their comedy skills to break into the condo development office, take out all of the guards and steal a set of plans that could save the club.
Tagline: "Die laughing."
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