BLOGS

I Want My DVD: Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Originally titled Bathtub Time Machine, this week's major DVD release was intended to teach kids about having fun while keeping clean, and featured several history-based games kids could play in the tub. Then, at the last minute, it was turned into a raunchy sex comedy.

Hot Tub Time Machine
Has a sequel to this film been greenlit yet? Because I have some ideas. Picture this: Jet Ski Time Machine. While on vacation in Aruba, four friends drive their jet skis over the speed limit and travel back in time to the 1990s, where they must help their teenage selves get laid in order to get back home. Or: Bikini Car Wash Time Machine. After putting the wrong kind of soap in the dispenser, a car wash attendant accidentally sends his father's prize Mustang back in time to the swinging 1970s, and he and three friends have to pile into and wash a VW Rabbit to go and retrieve it. Man, these things practically write themselves! (Also available via Movies on Demand.)

Percy Jackson & The Olympians: The Lightning Thief
One surefire way to torpedo your franchise before it starts is to give your movie a long-ass name. Kids don't want to have to say too many words when loudly insisting they be taken to the movies -- Harry Potter and the Sorceror's Stone was a mouthful, and that had four less syllables and a zillion more book sales to back it up. If they'd cut back, maybe now we'd be gearing up for Percy Jackson 2. (Also available via Movies on Demand.)

The Crazies
Just to be on the safe side, wear gloves when handling this DVD. An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of Timothy Olyphant not shooting you in the head.

Pretty Bird
Billy Crudup, Paul Giamatti and Kristen Wiig star in this movie about the development of the rocket belt. Why this wasn't a major theatrical release, I have no idea.

Stolen
Watching a modern-day Jon Hamm investigate a child disappearance from the 1930s, complete with extensive flashbacks to itinerant laborers, made me feel like I was watching Mad Men Season 27. Needless to say, I liked that feeling.

The Eclipse
Hopefully, the theatrical release of The Twilight Saga: Eclipse will cause people to accidentally pick this film up on DVD, because I loved this eerie and uncomfortable tale of writers, romance and scary-ass ghosts.

The White Ribbon
Given the choice, when debating which Best Foreign Language Film nominee to watch first, I always go with the German one. But that's just me. Personal preference.

Don McKay
I would watch Thomas Haden Church play a high school janitor who just does his job for two hours. Mopping, unclogging toilets, polishing trophies... Him getting caught up in a web of murder and deceit would just be icing on the cake.

Creation
It's ironic that Paul Bettany is playing Darwin here, since his wife is living proof of intelligent design. There's no way Jennifer Connelly just evolved to be that beautiful. God totally had a hand in things.

Warlords
Not loosely adapted from the Atari video game.

To see this week's TV releases, check out TV on DVD!

Want to immediately access TWoP content no matter where you are online? Download the free TWoP toolbar for your web browser. Already have a customized toolbar? Then just add our free toolbar app to get updated on our content as soon it's published.

Comments

SHARE THE SNARK

X

Get the most of your experience.
Share the Snark!

See content relevant to you based on what your friends are reading and watching.

Share your activity with your friends to Facebook's News Feed, Timeline and Ticker.

Stay in Control: Delete any item from your activity that you choose not to share.

MOST RECENT POSTS

BLOG ARCHIVES

Movies Without Pity

March 2014

4 ENTRIES

February 2014

4 ENTRIES

January 2014

4 ENTRIES

December 2013

4 ENTRIES

November 2013

4 ENTRIES

October 2013

5 ENTRIES

September 2013

4 ENTRIES

August 2013

4 ENTRIES

July 2013

5 ENTRIES

June 2013

4 ENTRIES

May 2013

5 ENTRIES

April 2013

5 ENTRIES

March 2013

4 ENTRIES

February 2013

4 ENTRIES

January 2013

5 ENTRIES

December 2012

3 ENTRIES

November 2012

3 ENTRIES

October 2012

5 ENTRIES

September 2012

4 ENTRIES

August 2012

4 ENTRIES

July 2012

5 ENTRIES

June 2012

4 ENTRIES

May 2012

5 ENTRIES

April 2012

4 ENTRIES

March 2012

4 ENTRIES

February 2012

4 ENTRIES

January 2012

5 ENTRIES

The Latest Activity On TwOP