One way that people rob something they fear of its power is by making fun of it. It's the basic tenet of propaganda and political campaigns, and I've always thought it also applied to the MPAA's treatment of nudity in the movies of late. For example, if a man shows his butt, the MPAA rates it PG-13; hell, Rob Schneider has made a career out of showing the place he pulls his movie ideas out of. But show a woman's ass and BAM!! Rated R! My explanation is that you can mine comedic potential from a guy's ass. I mean, it's where farts come from, and farts are funny!

Warner Bros. is not making friends in geekdom. Even as comic fans are slowly realizing that WB may very well be at fault in the Watchmen rights dispute, Harry Potter fans are casting Cruciatus curses at them for pushing back the release of Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince. The studio is getting such huge backlash, in fact, that Warner Bros President and COO Alan Horn had to issue a public response to all the complaints.

Hell hath no fury like comic book fans scorned. A recent post at LatinoReview.com caused all manner of angry response and controversy. Seems Lionsgate Films were continuing their current trend of pissing off gorehounds by forcing the director of the upcoming Punisher reboot to deliver a PG-13 rated cut. This after the folks at Comic Con got a decidedly R-rated preview of the upcoming film. Rumors flew like tennis balls at a Williams sisters match: director Lexi Alexander had been fired, the movie was horrible, the movie was butchered by the MPAA, etc. The one thing that appears to be true is that the film exists. After two previous misfires, I question why people are hoping this movie will give them what they finally want. Is the third time the charm?

Some movie theaters in England are getting rid of popcorn, according to The Guardian. Are rising corn prices to blame? Hardly. If anything, it's the relative affordability of those little golden kernels that has helped make them personae non grata at more upscale cinematic establishments. Although most will merely offer some popcorn-free screenings, one cinema-owner in London has vowed to "'de-popcorn every new venue" he acquires, citing its "overwhelming smell, the cultural idea of it and the operational problems created by the mess it produces." In the end, he says it's just not sophisticated enough. Oh, come on. Slap a little olive oil and smoked sea salt on it and serve it up in a pretty vellum bag. The posh crowd will snap it right up.

Well, damn. It turns out our earlier report of a certain young star having to go through amputation surgery on the heels of a traumatic car accident have been greatly exaggerated. The LA Times has put the rumors to rest, as Shia LeBeouf's publicist emailed them this morning saying the rumor was "totally untrue." And though publicists have been known to lie through their teeth ("Brad and Jennifer are not having problems and are very happy"), I believe them on this one.

Effing haaaaa!!!!!!!!!!! Finally, someone's seen fit to end the reign of terror that Elizabeth Gilbert's psycho-babble best-seller Eat, Pray, Love has wrought. Think, if you will, of the distinctly female quest for peace and sanity after a heart-rending breakup Gilbert explores in her tome, and then imagine its opposite: a cuckolded dude licking his wounds by going on an international sex and booze bender, only to come out the other side changed in no way whatsoever (ok that last part was just my own assumption based on previous dealings with dudes). That pretty much sums up the parody Drink, Play, F@#K, a comedy based on the forthcoming satire of the same name by writer Andrew Gottlieb (whose credits include work on the soon-to-air IFC series Z Rock). I sooooo see McConaughey or, like Seann William Scott in the starring role, don't you?

Incidentally, the big-screen version of EPL is being developed and rumor has it Julia Roberts is attached. In spite of my pesky X chromosomes, that's one movie you couldn't pay my ass to see. Well, alright you could pay me. But it'd have to be a lot. Like at least fifty bucks and a sixer of Zima. I know, I drive a hard bargain.

Stop the mutha-effin' presses you guys! The biggest event in tabloid media history has arrived! The twins are here! That's right, last night at approximately 7:30 PM, People.com revealed the exclusive pics of the wondrous Jolie-Pitt twins, and the world will never be the same! Vivienne Marcheline and Knox Leon! They are tiny! They are pink! Their eyes are closed! They have very little hair! They poop in their pants! It is a miracle of epic proportions! Babies, you guys! Real human babies! Sacred and magical ones! My life is complete now! I can die happy! [Jumps out window.]

A little while ago, before all of the flap about Sienna Miller and Balthazar Getty started flying around, we were treated to another fairly intimate bit of information about the actress. Apparently, on the set of G.I. Joe: Rise of Cobra, she was told by the director, Stephen Sommers, that he liked big breasts, and he could not lie -- which meant that she needed to wear some padding in her skin-tight Baroness costume. Now, over a month later, the studios are changing something else about her, and this time, it's personal... well, more personal than the small-boobs thing.

So, we only have one day left (unless you're going to the midnight showing tonight, which I am not because I am old and can't stay up that late anymore) before we all get to find out whether or not the X-Files movie is going to suck. For those of us who are hardcore fans, it's a bit of a sticky wicket. On the one hand, I've heard from an X-Phile friend "if it sucks or does badly in theaters, it serves them right for beating the show into the ground its last two years." On the other, I think, are the rest of us who really just want to see the franchise do well against everything else that's currently in theaters. (And I don't know if you've heard, but that Batman movie's doing pretty okay.)