BLOGS

The Society For the Prevention of Cruelty to Aging Action Stars

Is there something like the SPCA, only for action stars that maybe aren't quite as youthful as they once were? I can't help but think someone, somewhere needed to step in where The Spy Next Door is concerned and get Jackie Chan out of there. As some former knock-'em-out stars start heading toward their fifties and beyond, they try to transition into more mainstream roles. This isn't always easy, and some missteps will be made. In Chan's case, the missteps are becoming full-fledged leaps, as news come down the wire that Billy Ray Cyrus and George Lopez have just been cast to co-star with him in the comedy about mistaken identities. The two latest additions play CIA agents. The lineup, the premise... the whole thing has a "direct-to-DVD" sort of feel to it.

On the other end of the spectrum, there's Sylvester Stallone. True, the man's made some missteps of his own, but lately he's been working on The Expendables, a movie he's writing, directing, and co-starring in. It's familiar action fare, but he's delegating a bit. It's not all down to him, because he's got a pretty awesome team with Jason Statham and Jet Li, who will share in the ass-kicking duties as his fellow mercenaries. Now we find out that another veteran of the action has been recruited, and it's none other than Dolph Lundgren, who played baddie boxer Ivan Drago opposite Stallone in Rocky IV. Lundgren, who recently hesitated over taking a cameo in a Universal Soldier sequel, was apparently holding out for something better.

A Stallone/Li/Statham/Lundgren team-up is something I want to see. A Chan/Cyrus/Lopez team-up? It's just too painful to watch.

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