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Five Ways to Make Die Hard 5 Not Suck

by Mindy Monez May 5, 2010 3:35 PM
Five Ways to Make Die Hard 5 Not Suck

Many of the franchise's most passionate fans are fine leaving it as-is, but despite that, we're getting a Die Hard 5 anyway, and this time, we're going global. Which could mean anything, most likely something resembling an old, grizzled Bourne movie, and depending on when it comes out, it could be the Armageddon to the 24 movie's Deep Impact. It's superfluous, but it's not the end of the world. That doesn't mean it's not extremely easy to screw up, however (especially with the guy behind Swordfish, Hitman, and X-Men Origins: Wolverine in talks to write the script). Here's how to avoid that (besides not hiring that guy).

Harry Brown: Michael Caine's Craziest Role? Not By a Long Shot

In the new movie Harry Brown, Michael Caine plays a retired Royal Marine who sets out to avenge his only friend's death by killing the teenage hooligans who did the job. What follows is a bloody mix of Gran Torino and Death Wish, with Caine staying one step ahead of the ineffectual police as he acquires a gun and begins to work his way through the youths. Now, Caine is often cast as the roguish gentleman and the jolly, working-class type, but this is hardly the first psycho he's played. Luckily, we happen to love psycho Caine, so we thought we'd run down some of his craziest roles.

The Losers: They're Losers, Baby, So Why Can't You Kill Them?

It's interesting that The Losers and Kick-Ass have come out within one week of each other. Both are comic-book-based films, and neither features superpowers, unless you consider the ability to take a beating a super power. However, both feature crazy, old-fashioned fist and gun violence, usually depicted as a slow-mo ballet that looks like it came out of The Matrix. The Losers takes the violence more seriously, but it only makes the whole film seem all the more ridiculous when the inevitable preposterous scenarios occur that allow them to cheat death and recover from severe injury.

Midnight Run 2? Seven De Niro Sequels That Could Potentially Be Much Worse

When we saw the headline "Universal taking another Midnight Run," we were instantly appalled at the idea of a remake of the 1988 road movie starring Robert De Niro as a bounty hunter (apprehending an accountant played by Charles Grodin). Then we saw that it was going to be a sequel, and that De Niro would be reprising his role, and that it was his idea, and our disgust quickly turned to confusion. Does Midnight Run really need a sequel? Especially starring a 67-year old De Niro? We're not saying it'll definitely be terrible -- in fact, we can think of seven other De Niro films where a sequel would be a bigger travesty than whatever Another Midnight Run turns out to be. Little Fockers will be pretty awful, but these are the ones that signal Ragnarok.

I Want My DVD: Tuesday, March 9, 2010

by Zach Oat March 9, 2010 6:00 AM
I Want My DVD: Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Now that we've celebrated the Oscar nominees this past Sunday, it's time to go buy them! Two Best Picture candidates finally come out today, and they make the rest of the week's releases look like a sea of mediocrity in comparison.

Green Zone: Page One in the Matt Damon Pamphlet of Character Types

Matt Damon is back, and he's mad! In Green Zone, he plays a warrant officer tasked with finding weapons of mass destruction in Iraq, which mostly means he runs around pointing guns at people, scowling, getting captured, escaping, and openly threatening senior intelligence officials. So naturally, he -- wait a minute. We've seen this guy before. This is one of the stock characters from the Matt Damon playbook! Granted, it's not a very large playbook, but every character Matt Damon has ever played can be divided into one of five types. Here's a guide to the five, so you can recognize them in their natural habitats.

New Iron Man 2 Trailer: Double Your Recommended Dosage of Iron

If you were still awake after the Oscars ended last night, you may have caught Robert Downey Jr. on Jimmy Kimmel Live, where he debuted a brand-new Iron Man 2 trailer. Whether you're a comic book fan or a Robert Downey Jr. fan, this trailer is must-see material, since it showcases a lot more fun lines from the movie, as well as some major plot points and details. Here are our six favorites.

It's a Sequel! It's a Re-Boot! It's a Chance to Fix Four Franchises!

Four action-movie franchises have been in the news recently with good news -- all of them will be getting new installments in the near future. Daredevil, Riddick, Superman and Mission: Impossible's Ethan Hunt will all be returning to work, and they all have some big decisions to make. Besides M:I, which already reinvents itself stylistically with every film, they're all coming off of what could have been franchise-killing movies, so they're all going to have to follow M:I's lead. Here's some advice to the producers on what we want to see in each potential re-boot.

District 13 and Other Luc Besson Movies That Need TV Shows

by Zach Oat February 3, 2010 4:34 PM
District 13 and Other Luc Besson Movies That Need TV Shows

The news that La Femme Nikita would be coming back with a brand new TV series came as somewhat of a shock -- after all, we still can't believe that the awesome French action film from 1990 managed to inspire such a terrible Bridget Fonda movie, let alone the hit Peta Wilson TV show that lasted five seasons. But then again, it is an awesome shoot-'em-up written and directed by Luc Besson, the godfather of modern French action films. Which got us thinking -- are there any other films in Besson's distinctively awesome body of work (including films he directed and films he just wrote) that would make kick-ass weekly TV shows? We found several, including one that's playing at the local arthouse cinema...

Edge of Darkness: Even at 56, Mel is Still a Lethal Weapon

by Zach Oat January 29, 2010 11:47 AM
Edge of Darkness: Even at 56, Mel is Still a Lethal Weapon

Can you separate an actor's personal life from the role he plays? History has showed us that it's difficult, at best; after all, overpublicized off-screen relationships have sunk on-screen romances before. But even though Mel Gibson's public behavior over the past few years is embarrassing and occasionally reprehensible, will it stop people from wanting to see a bloody action film? Hopefully not, because while Gibson hasn't acted in a while, it's not because he forgot how. In Edge of Darkness, he shows that he still has the same intensity he had as Martin Riggs in the early Lethal Weapon films, and to skip the film because Gibson is delusional and morally bankrupt is to deny yourself the pleasure.

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