When I die and ascend to heaven's Pearly Gates, right before St. Peter says "Nuh-Unhhh!" and pushes the big button labeled Hell, he's going to sing "So long, see you honey/You can't buy me with your money." Thanks to the Hot Blog, I now know what my Hell is going to look like. Taking a cue from the numerous people who have danced in the aisles at the Winter Garden, Universal is now releasing the Sing-Along, Dance-Along version of Mamma Mia! That exclamation point belongs to the title, not my obvious excitement (not!) at this revoltin' development. As the worst part of any ABBA song appears onscreen, people can sing and dance, hopefully better than Pierce Brosnan does in the film. This is the beginning of the end, people! The 70's are returning and I'm all out of Afro Sheen! Next, folks will show up in bad jumpsuits and wigs, and CNN will catch self-admitted ABBA fan John McCain dropping it like it's hot to "Take a Chance On Me" at the AMC Googleplex in Phoenix.

Riddle me this, riddle me that -- who can possibly defeat the big, bad Bat? Not Brendan Fraser, Jet Li, three yetis and an army of zombies, that's for sure. The Dark Knight topped the box office for the third week in a row, bringing in an additional $43.8 million, for a grand total so far of 394.9 million in the U.S. alone -- plus $200 million overseas. And the film has yet to open in Germany and Russia. That's Bruce Wayne folding money, son! Sadly, Batman will be defeated next weekend by the combined forces of the Green Hornet (Seth Rogen) and the Green Goblin (James Franco) in the stoner action flick Pineapple Express. C'est la vie!

Finally some good news from the set of the latest 007 movie. Alicia Keys and Jack White are set to record the theme song for the 23rd James Bond film, Quantum of Solace. According to The Hollywood Reporter, the duo will make history by performing the first Bond song duet. It's not as impressive as Sheena Easton's history making appearance in For Your Eyes Only -- she remains the only singer to appear onscreen to serenade Mr. Bond's credits--but it'll have to do. I'll reverse that opinion if Jack White delivers a credible Shirley Bassey imitation. After all, she's the queen of Bond themes.

There are certain movies that should be put on a "Do Not Remake" list in order to preserve people's memories and enjoyment of them. Casablanca, for one. The Godfather, probably. Oh, and The Rocky Horror Picture Show. Fans have been proving for over 30 years that there is no way to improve on it, if the fact that they keep going to see it and acting it out verbatim is any indication. And yet MTV Pictures is going to remake the film, using the original screenplay. At least the old fans will still be able to say the lines.

I need to start by saying that I am not an inordinately rabid fan of ABBA, nor am I a musical theater acolyte -- in fact I hate musicals for their campy, over-the-top cheesiness. Needless to say, I did not see Mamma Mia! on Broadway. I went to see an early screening of the film adaptation of said Broadway musical with a fair amount of trepidation. And I was pleasantly surprised by my lack of homicidal feeling once the closing credits rolled.